Funny SMS / Text Messages

Advice on staying calm when people insult you with any number of names — until they call you beautiful, which crosses a line.

Log aapko BURA kahe dont mind
PAGAL kahe ghussa nahi hona
JAHIL kahe tou bhi kool rehna
or agr KHUBSURAT kahe tou mun pai aik thappar marna
mazaq ki bhi koi had hoti hai.

yun tou hum bhi B madad kiya nahi karte

This friendship is presented as exceptional evidence — the sender doesn't help, share, or even miss-call anyone, yet makes an exception here.

yun tou hum bhi B madad kiya nahi karte
chocolate kiya toffee bhi diya nahi kerte.
ye dosti sirf aap say werna msg kiya
hum miss call bhi kisi ko diya nahi kertay...

Susti ki intiha

Peak laziness: a boy refuses to get his own water and engineers a situation where his threatening father brings it for him.

susti ki intiha,
Boy:papa aik glass paani de do
Papa:khud le lo
Boy:plz de do naa
Papa:Ab manga tou thappar maronga
Boy:Thappar marnay ao tou paani lete aana:-)

SMS bhejne ki koshish keroo

A self-aware SMS that calls out the reader directly for enjoying free texts while sending nothing back.

Sitam sehne ki bhi koi had hoti hai,
kisi ko satane ki bhi koi had hoti hai,

SMS bhejne ki koshish keroo,
Mufat k SMS parhne ki bhi koi had hoti hai.

Nazar mobile pai tika rakhi hai,

Phone fully charged, eyes on the screen, battery ready — but the friends involved guarantee nothing is coming.

SMS ki umeed laga rakhi hai,
Nazar mobile pai tika rakhi hai,
Battery bhi full charge ker k rakhi hai,
per SMS aenge kesay?
Dosti KANJUSON say ko bana rakhi hai.

Mujhey bhi aisay hi mila tha :p

An almost completely empty text with a single punchline at the bottom — the sender received theirs exactly the same way.

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Qasam say mujhay bhi esay he mila tha:P

Chipkali ne gana start kia

A lizard riddle that builds slowly — three on a wall, one starts singing, two fall, and the reason is satisfying.

3 chippkalian deevar per chal rahi thein,
1 ne gana start kia
jese hi gana khatam huwa 2 gir gayain
batao kion?
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Is liye k baqi 2 ne taaliyan bajai thein :-)

Pathan ko dost ne khanay pe bulaya

A Pathan arrives at a locked door with a taunting note from his friend and comes up with the ideal written response.

Pathan ko dost ne khanay pe bulaya
pathan jub aya to ghar pe tala laga tha
or likha tha bewaqoof banay tumko,

Pathan ne Hoshiyari dikhai or niche likh dia,
"Hum tu aaya hi nahin tha"

Kisi k pass job ho to batayega

A polite job-seeking SMS from a very recognizable name, complete with a promise to send his CV when needed.

Salam pyare!
Agar apke pas ya
ap k jan'nay walon main kisi k pas
JOB ho to mujhey plz batayega.
Main apna CV aap ko bheij donga.

Aapka bhai,
Pervez Musharraf.

Don ka intezaar...

Every girl in eleven colleges is waiting for the mysterious Don — who has one small academic problem standing in the way.

Don ka intezar to 11 colleges ki larkion ko hai
Per don ka aana mushkil hi nahin namumkin bhi hai,
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Kion k
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Don matric fail hay

Aap mujhe itne pasand ho jitna....

A rundown of how much the sender likes you, using increasingly undignified comparisons that start with owls and end considerably worse.

Aap mujhe itne pasand ho jitna....
ullo ko raat,;-(
Dentist ko daant,:-D
gadhe ko laat,:-p
gharib ko gaddi,B-)
kuttay ko haddi aur
Nange ko chaddi.Ha ha

1 kabootar

A pigeon flies up and up until it's completely out of sight, and that's the whole story — go back to work.

1 Kabootar

Itna Ura

Itna ura

itna ura

Bohut upar gaya,

Itna

itna

bus ab nazar nahin aa raha
apna kaam karo, kal dhondain gay