Aap mujhe itne pasand ho jitna....

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1. Itne kamzor ho gaye teri judai se

Itne kamzor ho gaye teri judai se, Wah wah wah? arz kia he Itne kamzor ho gaye teri judai se, k 1 din machar hi utha le gaya charpai se

2. Itne kum marks..??

Baap: Itne kum marks..?? 2 thappar lagne chahiyen.!! Beta: Han papa! mein nay to us kameenay mastar ka ghar bhi dekh liya hay...!!

3. Mujhe sardar bana do

Admi:Mujhe sardar bana do Doc: uske liye tumhara 50% dimagh nikalna parega Admi: OK Doctor ne ghalti se 90% nikal dia. Admi hosh mein aa k bola: Khocha ye tumne kia kar dia.

4. Gharib khandan per essay

1 ameer larki ko scheel me gharib khandan pe essay likhne ko kaha gaya. Essay:1 gharib khandan tha, baap gharib, maa gharib, bachay gharib, khandaan me 4 nauker they,wo bhi gharib,car bhi tuti hoi thi. unka gharib driver bachon ko usi toti car mein school chor k aata tha. bachon k paas purane mobile thay. […]

5. Tum kuttay ho kuttay hi raho gay

Tum kuttay ho kuttay hi raho gay tumhari aanay wali sari naslain kuttay ki maut marengi tum khud bhi kuttay ki maut marogay! . . . . Billi ne ye kuttay se kaha or chali gayi

6. Child 2 dentist doctor

Child 2 dentist doctor..!!! Kya dard k baigar bhi daant nikalay ja saktay hain ?? Dr: nahi Child: ager main nikal k dikhao Dr: nikaloo Child: he he he he he he

7. Sardarni: Ji 2si gaddi eni tej kyu bhja rahe ho?

Sardarni: Ji 2si gaddi eni tej kyu bhja rahe ho? Sardar: Areh,gaddi di break fail ho gayi hai, is sey pehley k accident ho jae, jaldi jaldi ghar pohunchain gay!

8. beta aik acha sa jhoot bolo

Uncle aik bachay se kehte hain : beta aik acha sa jhoot bolo agar mujhe pasand agaya to main tumhien paanch rupay doon ga bacha masoomiat se : yeh lo ! abhi to das rupay kahay thay .... !!!!

9. Memon ka beta & girl friend

Memon ka beta apni girl friend k sath date maar ker ghar aaya to baap nay pocha, kitnay paisay kharch karey? Beta: Rs.50. Baap:itne saray kion?? Beta: us k paas itne hi thay.

10. Khud ko kar buland itnaa

Khud ko kar buland itnaa K, "Himaalaya ki choti pe jaa pahunche" Aur khuda tujhse puche, > "Abe sale gadhe. ab utrega kaise"

11. Dil kerta hai tujhey kuttay k agay dal dun

Train mai aik husband apni wife say: tujh say shadi ker k pachta raha hun dil kerta hai tujhey kuttay k agay dal dun samnay wala passenger:wao wao wao wao!!!

12. Muqabla mumkin hay

Agar aap me or gadhe me english speaking ka muqabla ho jaye to kon jitega? ? ? ? Jeete jo marzi par ab ye baat to tay hai k muqabla mumkin hay

13. To ye unka personal problem hay

Pappu pinko ko pasand karta hay aur Pinki Pappu k bhai ko Jab k pappu k bhai ko Pinki ki behan achi lagti hai aur Pinki ki behan ko Pappu ko pasand karti hai Halan-k pappu pehle hi pinki ko chahta hai Ab jab-k pinko ko pappu acha nahin lagta aur Pappu ka bhaipinki k […]

14. Suno ghour se pepsi walo

Suno ghour se pepsi walo, Buri nazar na coke pe dalo, Chahe jitna dew pila lo, Sabse aage hoga NIMBU PANI!! Hai na hum pure hindustani.

15. 2-4 patthar nhi chaba sakte?

Husband: ALLAH ne tumhein 2 aakhen di hain chaawal se patthar nahi nikal sakti? WIFE: ALLAH ne tumhe 32 daant diye hai 2-4 patthar nhi chaba sakte?

16. AAj ke friends I TELL U

AAj ke friends I TELL U, Kitne busy WHAT DO U DO, Koi mujhe bole I MISS U, Koi mujhe bole NO TIME 4 U, Kash koi mujh se kahy oh my dost/ i am just free 4 u

17. Air hostess pathan se

Air hostess pathan se: Sir aap kia lena pasand karainge? Pathan: Mere lea TAWEEZ wali chai lao. Airhostess:Sir woh taweez nahi TEA BAG hai .... :)

18. Gun main nay chupa di thi

Sardar: Raat mujhe ek aadmi ne chaku dikhakar loot liya. Friend:Lekin tere pas to hamesha Gun hoti hai. Sardar:Wo maine chupa di thi, warna wo bhi chori ho jati.

19. Pehlay KISS karo, phir palang per litao

Pehle KISS karo, phir PALANG per leta do, phir CHADDI utar do, phir NICHE haath lagao, . . . . Aur check karo k BABY ne SU SU to nahi kiya na

20. Benazir aae gi...

Benazir aae gi, Kapre dilae gi, Bhookay ko khana khilae gi, Bay ghar ko makan dilae gi, . . . Phir gharib ki ankh khule jae gi, Kion k subah jo ho jaye gi ;-)

21. Mera wohi mizaj wohi zoq hoga

Mein woh nai k shaadi hoi or badal gia, Mera wohi mizaj wohi zoq hoga, Shade se pehle bhi mujhe shadi ka shoq ho ga, Shadi k bad bhi mujhe shadi ka shoq ho ga:p

22. Agar manzil ko pana hai to hosla sath rakhna

Agar manzil ko pana hai to hosla sath rakhna, Agar pyar ko pana hay to aetbar sath rakhna, Agar hamesha muskurana hay to DAANT saaf rakhna

23. Subha se le kar sham tak

Subha se le kar sham tak, Sham se le ker raat tak, Raat se le kar subha tak, Subha se phir shaam tak . . . . . . . Bus yaar light ne tang kia howa hay

24. Robot slapping on telling a lie

1 parents apnay betay k liye aisa robot laye jo jhoot bolnay per thapar marta hay. Son:Abu aj mei bemar hon school nahi jaonga Chatakh! Baap:tumne jhot bola, me jub tumhare jitna tha kabhi jhoot nahin bolta tha Chatakh! Mom:Kia howa? Baap:Yeh chintu jhoot bolta hai MoM:Zahir hy apka hi beta hay.. Chatakh¢â‚¬Â¦!!!:-)

25. Robot slapping on telling a lie

1 parents apnay betay k liye aisa robot laye jo jhoot bolnay per thapar marta hay. Son:Abu aj mei bemar hon school nahi jaonga Chatakh! Baap:tumne jhot bola, me jub tumhare jitna tha kabhi jhoot nahin bolta tha Chatakh! Mom:Kia howa? Baap:Yeh chintu jhoot bolta hai MoM:Zahir hy apka hi beta hay.. Chatakh...!!!:-)

26. EID MUBARAK to har koi Keh dega tumse

Koi itna Chahe Tumhe to batana, Koi tumhare itne Naaz uthaaye to Batana, EID MUBARAK to har koi Keh dega tumse, Koi Hamari tarah kahey to batana

27. Tu chand mangay main chand dedon,

Tu chand mangay main chand dedon, tu raat mangay me raat dedon, tu dil mange me dil dedon, tu jaan mange . . . Bas yaar Bhik mangnay ki bhi ek limit hoti hai..

28. Aray hamain to apnon ne luta

Aray hamain to apnon ne lota gheron mein kahan dum tha Meri haddy thi wahan tooti jahan hospital band tha, Mujhay jis ambolence mein dala uska petrol khatam tha, mujhay rakshay main is liye bithaya Q K is ka fare kum tha, Mujhey docter ne uthaya nurse main kahan daM tha, Mujhe jiS beD per […]

29. kitna bhi chaho na bhol paoge

Kitna bhi chaho na bhol paoge Hum se jitna dur jao nazdik pao ge Humein mita sakte ho to mita do yaadein meri, magar.. kya sapno se juda kar pao ge humein.

30. Mar jaoun ga tumhein manane ke liye

Tum hasti ho mujhe hasane ke liye Tum roti ho mujhe rulane ke liye Tum ek bar rooth kar to dekho Mar jaoun ga tumhein manane ke liye

31. Ghussa ko pinay * qasoor maf karnay walay

 AL-QURAN  "Jo log ghussay ko pee jatay hain aur doosron k qasoor muaaf kar detay hain, aise naik log ALLAH Ko buhat hi pasand hain" (Aal-e-Imran:134)

32. Koi zabt de na jalal de

Koi zabt de na jalal de, Mujhe sirf itna kamal de, Mai har ek ki sada banun, K zamana meri misaal de, Teri rehmaton ka nuzool ho, Meri mehnaton ka sila milay, Mujhe maal o zar ki hawas na ho, Mujhe bas tu rizq e halal de, Mere zehen mai Teri fikr ho, Meri saans […]

33. Computer mein windows

Sardar:Yar mujhe 1 hathora or keel chahiye computer k lye. Sales man:Magar computer me inka kia kam? Sardar:Oye yar mujhe computer mein windows lagani hai.