Funny SMS: jokes and funny text messages in English and Urdu
Three pieces of advice: show your love, show your beauty, and please — stop the perfume and just take a bath.
Apne pyar ko mat chupao,
ise zarurat h jatane ki,
Apni khubsurti ko mat chupao,
ise zarurat h dikhane ki...
Ab aur PERFUME mat lagao,
tumhain zarurat h nahane ki
Tried drawing your portrait as a keepsake to hold close — ended up using it to scare children instead.
Teri yaad mein humne qalam uthaya liya
paper aur tasveer aapki banayi
socha tha k usko dil se laga kar rakhenge
magar
woh to bacho ko daraane ke kaam aayi...
An angry boss asks if you've ever seen an owl, watches you look down, then tells you to look up — and meet one.
Angry boss: Tumne kabhi Ullu dekha hai?
Executive (sar jhukate hue): Nahin sir.
Boss: Niche kya dekh rahe ho ? Meri taraf dekho.
A Sardar lies on train tracks citing a past near-miss with a plane as evidence he's completely invincible.
1 sardar rail ki patri per sogaya.
1 admi ne kaha kia ker raho ho?
Train aayegi tu mar jao gay!
Sardar:Mairy oper se jahaz guzar gaya
tu kuch nahin howa, rail kia cheez hay?
A Sardar kid reports a magic trick — bathroom light turns on by itself when he opens the fridge door. Mom immediately knows what happened.
Chota Sardar: Mummy Kal Raati Jadu Hoya.....
Main Bathroom DA darwaja Kholaya Te Light Ap he Jal Paree.
Mummy :Oyeeeeeeee Tu fir Fridge Vich Susu Kar ditaaa
A Sardar is sentenced to a 5am execution and finds it genuinely funny — for a very practical reason.
Police:Tumhe kal subah 5 baje phasi di jayegi.
Sardar: Ha Ha Ha Ha!
Police:Kion has rahe ho?
Sardar:Main to uthta hi subha 9 baje hon.!
hehehe:d
Friendship blessing SMS that curves into a wish for you to do all the work while the sender gets your paycheck.
Anso tumare niklein ankhein meri hon,
Anso tumare niklein ankhein meri hon,
Dil tumara dhadk dhadkane meri hon,
KHUDA KARE,
hamari dosti itni gahri ho,
K
nokri tum karo salary meri ho
Wife tells Sardar to slow the bike because she's scared; he says if she's scared she can just close her eyes like he already has.
Wife:Please bike taze na chalao
mujhey dar lag raha hay.
Sardar: Agar tujhy bhi dar lag raha hay
to meri tarah ankhein band kar lay.:P
Man asks to be made a sardar; doctor removes 90% of his brain by accident; man wakes up and speaks only in English.
Admi:Mujhe sardar bana do
Doc: uske liye tumhara 50% dimagh nikalna parega
Admi: OK
Doctor ne ghalti se 90% nikal dia.
Admi hosh mein aa k bola: Khocha ye tumne kia kar dia.
A mock motivational morning message that ends with a blunt request: your messages smell, please just bathe.
Susti bhare jism ko jagate kyun nahi,
Uth kar sab k saamne aate kyo nahi,
Msg bhi tumhara smell marta hai,
Thodi himmat kar k NAHATE kyun nahi...
A missile is launched at someone annoying — it comes back because the target has no brain to explode inside.
>--->
>--->
Ja mere Mizail ja, jo mujhe SMS na kare us k Dimagh me phat ja
<---< arey wapis Q agaya? Mizail: us k paas to dimag hi nahi
Sardar's wife made unusually tasty chicken; confesses the bird got a little burnt so she applied Burnol (burn ointment) to it.
Sardar:Begum aaj chicken
bohut maze ki bani hai kia
koi khaas masala lagaya hai ?
Sardarni:Nahi bus zara murghi jal gai
thi wo main ne BURNOL laga di thi.