Funny SMS: jokes and funny text messages in English and Urdu
A short folk tale about a village of laughing witches — ending with the punchline that the receiver clearly grew up there.
Door kahin ek basti thi,
Wahan churailain basti thein,
Un k andar bari masti thi,
Jab dekho wo hansti thin,
Tum jo itna hansti ho,
Usi basti ki lagti ho ;-)
Sardar takes his wife in labour to Pizza Hut instead of the hospital — because delivery is free there.
Ek sardarni ko labour pain ho raha tha,
sardarji uneh 'PIZZA HUT' le ja rahe tha .
Kisi ne pucha hospital kyo nahi jate,
to sardarji bole "oye u don't know
delivery is free in PIZZA HUT.
A restaurant scene: boy proposes marriage one last time, girl says no, boy immediately asks the waiter for separate bills.
Boy : main last baar puchh raha hoon ,
tum mujhse shaadi karogi ??
Girl : Nahi
Boy : Soch Lo
Girl : Keh Diya na Nahi
Boy : Waiter , Bill alag-alag lana
A doctor asks a husband if he and his wife share the same blood type. Husband says of course — she's been drinking his for fifty years.
Doctor ne admi se pucha …
Kia aap ka aur aapki biwi ka khoon aik hi hai?
Admi ne kaha..
Kiu nahi? Zarur hoga! Pachaas(50)
saal se mera hi khoon pi rahi hai na.
An Eid SMS written as if the message itself is a messenger — bowing at the recipient's feet to deliver the greeting.
Ae mere SMS Khata na karna, Qadmon mai ja Girnaaa
Puchey jo Haal, Jhuk ker Eid Mubarak kehna
A Hindu man walks home after his wife's cremation; a sudden storm erupts and he nods knowingly — she's arrived.
Aik hindu apni biwi ka antim sanskar
kar k ghar ja raha tha ki achanak bijli chamki,
badal garje, zor se baarish shuru hui
dukhi aadmi bola: Lagta hai pahunch gai
A Memon stereotype joke: he finds something on the road and grumbles about how wastefully people throw things away.
1 memon road se guzar raha tha,
achanak usne jhuk kar road se kuch uthaya
aur zoor se chillaya,
kameenaay log
poti b aesi kartai hen jaisay koi samoosa para ho..
A mock blessing SMS that asks God to give all the reader's happiness — and sacrifice Musharraf to make it happen.
Elahi aaj yeh farman likh de
har khusi sms perhne wale k naam likh de
Agar uski khushi k liye kisi ki jan chahiye
To us pe PERVAIZ MUSHARRAF ka naam likh de
Starts as a romantic poem about not surviving without someone — ends with the real confession: who will I fool without you?
Tumse mil kar hogaya zindgi se pyar
Raah main chorr kar mat jana mere yaar
Bin tere hum ji na payenge
Tum na hoge to hum
BEWAQOOF
kisay banayenge;-)
A dream-sequence joke where a girl neither accepts nor rejects, but keeps falling for the sender's friend inside his own dreams.
Na woh inkaar karti hai,
Na woh ikraar karti hai,
Kambakhat mere hi sapnon main aa kar,
Mere dost se pyaar karti hai
Nostalgic SMS about the days when the sender freely hugged beautiful women — back when he was two years old.
Woh bhi kiya din the jub hum
haseenon ke galey mila karte the,
Ye un dinon ki baat hai
jub hum 2 saal ke hua kartey the
A son tells his father the neighbor's daughter doesn't understand English — then explains exactly how he reached this conclusion.
Son: parosi ki Larki Ko English Nahi Ati,
Father: Tujhe Kese Pata?
Son: Mene Kaha"Give Me Sweet Kiss"
To Osne 2 Thappar Mar Diye. jahiiiL ki bachi....,