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Wife comes home late at night
Wife comes home late at night
and quietly opens the door to her bedroom.
From under the blanket
she sees four legs instead of two!
She reaches for a baseball bat
and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can.
Once she's done,
she goes to the kitchen to have a drink.
As she enters,
she sees her husband there, reading a magazine. :s
"hi darling", he says,
"your parents have come to visit us,
so I let them stay in our bedroom.
Hope you have said hello to them.
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Wife came home with a goat. Husband asked"Is bhains ko ghar kion lai ho?" Wife:"Dikhta nahin, bakri hy!" Husband:"Bakri se hi poch raha hon"
A man to Santa: Your friend is kissing your wife in your home. Santa rushes home and came back within half an hour and slapped the man and said: "He's not my friend."
Husband sent a text to his wife at night, "Hi I will get late, please try and wash all my dirty clothes and make sure you prepare my favorite dish before I return." He sent another text, "And I forgot to tell you that I got an increase in my salary at the end of […]
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An Angry Wife To Her Husband 0n Phone: "Where d Hell Are You ... ?" Husband: Darling You Remember That Jewelery Shop Where You Saw The Diamond Necklace n Totally Fell In Love With It n I Didn't Have Money That Time n I said "Baby It'll Be Yours 1 Day ... " O:) Wife, […]
If you were my husband, I would poison your coffee If you were my wife I would drink it.
wife:honey,what r u looking 4? husband: nothing wife:why have u been reading our marriage certificate 4 an hour ? husband: i was just looking 4 the expiry date
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Husband wife watching an IPL match together: After 5 minutes: Wife: Is this Bret Lee? Husband: No, this is Chris Gayle, Bret Lee is a bowler. Wife: Okay, oh look, another wicket. Husband: No, this is just a replay of the last one. Wife: Hmm, looks like India is going to win this one. Husband: […]
Wife Running After A Garbage Truck: Am I Too Late For The Garbage? Hubby Following Her Yelled: Not Yet. Jumpppp Innnn Fastttt.
Husband to a newly wed wife! I could go to the end of the world for you Wife:Thanks,but promise me you will stay there for the rest of your life.
True bravery is to arrive home ... fully drunk.. a late night out.. and mom waiting with a jharu in hand and you ask "hey mom, abhi tak jaag rahi ho."
Woman Buys A New Sim Card Puts It In Her Phone And Decides To Surprise Her Husband Who Is Seated On The Couch In The Living Room. She Goes To The Kitchen, Calls Her Husband With The New Number: "Hello Darling" The Husband Responds In A Low Tone: "Let Me Call U Back Later Honey, […]
Wife:What is 10 years with me? Husband:A second. Wife:What is $1000 for me? Husband:A coin. Wife: Ok give me a coin. Husband:Wait a second
Wife is dreaming in the middle of the night and suddenly shouts: "Up! Quick! My husband is back!" Man gets up, jumps out of the window, hurts himself, and then realizes: "Damn, I am the husband!"
World most never be late message ever I will be there in 5 minutes. If not, read this again.
When I came home in the rain, My Brother Asked: Why U Didn't take an Umbrella. Sister:(Advised) why didn't U wait till rain stopped. Father(Angrily): Warned! only after getting cold, U will realize. . Mother: while drying my Hair, said, "STUPID RAIN! couldn't it wait, till my child came home." Thats MAA (Mother)
Husband asks: Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It means... Without Information, Fighting Everytime! WIFE says: No darling , it means :- With Idiot For Ever
Husband aur Wife Hotel me gaye tabhi 1 Lady ne Hello kiya, Wife nay pocha,"Koun Thi Wo?" Husband:-Tum dimagh kharab mat karo, main pehle hi pareshan hun k woh bhi Yehi pochay gi.
Ghalib ne girlfriend ko date per bulaya wo late aayi, Girl: Am I late ? Ghalib: Falak pey chand sitaron ko neend aarahi hai, Doosri ka time ho gaya hai, tu ab aa rahi hai. :-)
Sorry for late SMS Actually police arrested me for killing a girl I swear I didn't kill her I just asked her ,"will u marry me?" and woh khushi se mar gaye:D:p
V make thm cry who care 4 us, V cry 4 those who never care 4 us n we care 4 those who ll never cry 4 us. Ths is d truth of life, its strange bt true. once v realize it, its never too late 2 change
Don't wait until it's too late to tell someone how much you love, how much you care. Because when they're gone, no matter how loud you shout and cry, they won't hear you anymore. Happy Valentine's Day
Wife: If I die what will u do? Husband: Main paagal ho jaun ga! Wife: Will u marry again after I die? Husband: Pagal kuch bhi kar sakta hai
A woman went shopping, At cash counter she opened her purse to pay. The cashier noticed a TV remote in her purse. He cud'nt control his curiosity n asked "Do u always carry ur TV remote with u?" She replied " No, not always, but my husband refused to accompany me for shopping today.. The […]
''An Intelligent Wife Is One Who Makes Sure She Spends So Much That Her Husband Can't Afford Another Women" :P
Wife: I wish I was a newspaper so I would be in ur hands allday. Husband: I too wish that u were a newspapers so I could have a new one everyday.
When an angel came to me, he asked: "What is your wish for tonight?" I said "Please take care of the person who's reading this message." Good night!
Husband:u will never succeed in making that dog obey u! Wife:Nonsense it's only a matter of patience, I had a lot of trouble with u at first.
Wife : I saw in my dream that u were buying a diamond ring 4 me . . . Husband : i saw your dad paying da bill
Husband & wife are like liver and kidney. Husband is liver & wife is kidney. If liver fails, kidney fails. If kidney fails, liver manages with other kidney.
Husband throwing knives on wifes picture. All were missing the target! Suddenly he received call from her "Hi,wat ru doin?" His honest reply,"MISSING U"