Toilet seat Quote by Jarod Kintz

“I always leave the toilet seat up. It’s just easier to wash my hair that way.”

— Jarod Kintz

“To keep my cat from drinking out of the toilet, I could close the toilet lid, I could close the bathroom door, or I…

— Jarod Kintz

“I’m so constipated that every time I go to shit, the only thing that comes out is political rhetoric.”

— Jarod Kintz

“There really isn't much use in getting into a pissing contest since I have to sit down to pee anyway.”

— Tammy Blackwell

“Like when the counselor delved into your habits of using a public toilet, such as do you flush with your foot and use your…

— Charles Frazier

“Go stick your head in the toilet and flush twice,”

— Dean Koontz

“If you want to keep something from falling in the tiolet - shut the lid. (Politicians might do well to memorize this.)”

— R. Felini

“I think you’re funny, and the toilet sounds like a soda can opening when it flushes. It’s a diet soda, so it’s less filling…

— Jarod Kintz

“With all the seats empty, you could pretend everyone’s just gone to the bathroom.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

“I understand toilets were not yet invented when you were born, but is it really so hard to put the seat down?”

— Christy Gissendaner

“I'm past competing in pissing contests. My jet stream is now more of a trickle. The only contest I'd win is the number of…

— Brian MacLearn

“Always keep your mouth closed when cleaning the toilet.”

— Richard J Bell