“One of the classier features of this home was the padded toilet seat. It was high-mileage puffy brown vinyl-colored foam and made… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
“Its okay Ginny. Don't be upset. We'll send you a toilet seat or something. Fred and George said to Ginny” — J.K. Rowling Copy Share Image
I used to throw stuff out of the window and trash hotel rooms - and superglue all the drawers shut and superglue… — Joe Walsh Copy Share Image
All that matters to me is the man in front of me right now. (Tory) I’m not a man, Soteria. (Acheron) I… — Sherrilyn Kenyon Copy Share Image
Don't, Ginny, we'll send you loads of owls. We'll send you a Hogwarts toilet seat. George! Only joking, Mum. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I believe your friends Mr. Fred and George Weasly tried to send you a toilet seat. — Harry Potter - Albus Dumbledore Copy Share Image
The worst part about shitting in a public restroom, is when the tip of your dick touches the toilet seat. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Amazing Home Remedies: Avoid arguments with the females about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I flew back just in time to pick up a toilet seat for my girlfriend. It didn't go over that well. I… — Ben Affleck Copy Share Image
“I always lift both lids of the toilet seat before I pee. Then I sit down while tinkling. If you think that’s… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of… — Rita Rudner Copy Share Image
“That was one thing about dating a warrior, she supposed. He wouldn’t get mad if she wanted to beat him up for… — Emma Alisyn Copy Share Image
“ Gains There is no man in the house that I have to try to make happy. There are no more arguments,… — Suzanne Finnamore Copy Share Image
Online, you're providing each other with the good aspects of being together as far as communication and support, but you don't have… — Nev Schulman Copy Share Image
I've spiked a toilet seat before, a gallon of milk, even eggs. If you say it, I've probably spiked it before. — Rob Gronkowski Copy Share Image
“I can’t function here anymore. I mean in life: I can’t function in this life. I’m no better off than when I… — Ned Vizzini Copy Share Image
“Finally, I found what seemed at the time to be a lid of some sort. Presuming it was a toilet seat (but… — Dave Mustaine Copy Share Image
“He kissed my cheek. “Don’t worry I’m far from perfect. Ask my mom. I can never remember to put the toilet seat… — Micalea Smeltzer Copy Share Image
“you must wear it like she wears disappointment on her face you must hide the surprise of tasting other men on your… — Warsan Shire Copy Share Image
I only got a toilet seat cushion so my face would be comfortable after an intense night of drinking. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Dr. Frank Daschner once infuriated his colleagues by declaring: "You can sit on any toilet seat without the least risk, but don't,… — Edward Tenner Copy Share Image
Now, as husbands go, I have to admit I did all right. Joe is unquestionably handsome, doesn't leave ragged toenail clippings scattered… — Jenna McCarthy Copy Share Image
“In the bathroom two water tumblers were sealed in cellophane sacks with the words: "These glasses are sterilized for your protection." Across… — John Steinbeck Copy Share Image
When I got my Oprah money, the first thing I bought was a really nice electronic bidet toilet seat. It just feels… — Zach Anner Copy Share Image
