Amy Poehler and I have been friends for so long, we're like Oprah and Gale. Only we're not denying anything. — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
Some people say, Never let them see you cry. I say, if youre so mad you could just cry, then cry. It… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
Only in comedy, by the way, does an obedient white girl from the suburbs count as diversity. — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
When humor works, it works because it's clarifying what people already feel. It has to come from someplace real. — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
Sometimes when you're doing a comedy, the director will yell out "alts" and then the director gets the first laugh. — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
Wafah Dufour bin Laden, niece of Osama bin Laden has signed a contract to star in a reality show... called Skating with… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
At the upcoming Grammy Awards, Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony will perform together as the first time, as man and wife. Hopefully… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“A little tiny person with nothing to worry about running in circles, worried out of her mind.” — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
This week, penny collector Gene Sukie went to the bank and cashed in ten thousand pounds of pennies he had collected over… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“Anytime there's a bad female stand-up somewhere, some dickhead Interblogger will deduce that “women aren't funny.” Using that same math, I can… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“To this day, all I know is there are between two and four openings down there and that the set up inside… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
The comedy for the Democrats is that they're showing off too much. They need to be putting a boring white guy out… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
At the request of the Catholic Church, a three-day sex orgy to be held near Rio de Janeiro was cancelled last Friday.… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
When a man plays a woman in a dress, you're halfway there. It's inherently funny. When a woman plays a man, for… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
In an interview, Paris Hilton said that of her and her sister, "People love to hate us. But when you know us,… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
If you want to make an audience laugh, you dress a man up like an old lady and push her down the… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“A few months after our friendly chat about kids (and my condescending remarks about New York), Mrs. Palin told conservative filmmaker John… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“My dad looks like Clint Eastwood. His half-Scottish, half-German face in repose is handsome but terrifying. I searched the audience for him… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“The first rule of improvisation is AGREE. Always agree and SAY YES. When you're improvising, this means you are required to agree… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
There are a couple of things I want to impart to ladies who want to be in comedy: One, you don’t have… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“Right up until camera time, I was sweaty and green from having to touch my own eyeballs like that. If you've never… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
Someone once said that to make a regular person laugh, you need to dress a guy up like an old lady and… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“...Whenever someone says to me, 'Jerry Lewis says women aren't funny,' or 'Christopher Hitchens says women aren't funny,' or 'Rick Fenderman says… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
I feel like there is a lot of inherent humor in the stress and insanity surrounding that process. People lose their minds,… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“When did you first feel like a grown woman and not a girl?” We wrote down our answers and shared them, first… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“I was ten years old. I had noticed something was weird earlier in the day but I knew from commercials that one's… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“What were you thinking when we were holding hands diagonally?" I ask. Jeff says, "I was thinking, 'It's going to be so… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“The second rule of improvisation is not only to say yes, but YES, AND. You are supposed to agree and then _add… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“Most photographers have some kind of verbal patter going on when they shoot: "Great. Turn to me. Big smile. Less shark eyes.… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“My Chocolate Mudslide is going down smooth when we hear the three bells. Bing. Bing. Bing. But instead of Dan Dan the… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
The ladies of comedy now are comfortable dressing up. It's not forbidden anymore. — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
If these two are tired of having sex with each other, what hope is there for the rest of us? — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts. — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
In a study, scientists report that drinking beer can be good for the liver. I'm sorry, did I say 'scientists'? I meant… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
In real life, people in the most dire situations must cope through humor. — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
A recent study announced that 52 per cent of all teens who sign virginity pledges recant them within twelve months. If I'm… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
I never dreamed I would receive the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, mostly because my style is so typically Austrian. — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“Maybe we women gravitate toward comedy because it is a socially acceptable way to break rules and a release from our daily… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“Thomas Jefferson - another gorgeous white boy who would not have been interested in me.” — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
Researches reported that they developed a self-healing plastic that repairs itself if cracked. The plastic will change the way airplanes are built… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
I really like John McCain. He's an awesome dude and was a lot of fun when he hosted "SNL." I'd love to see a… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
You mostly know that you want to be funny, know that you have the desire. It's not like people who grow up beautiful and… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
Whatever the problem, be part of the solution. Don’t just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles. — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
Pentagon records show that at least 8,000 members of the all-volunteer U.S. Army have deserted since the Iraq war began. Hey, at least somebody… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“That summer I got to know four families in which half the children were gay. In case you’re interested from a sociological point of… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
You can be a little bit darker and rougher on the stage, partly because when you're in the theater, people have come to see… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
[...] things most people do naturally are often inexplicably difficult for me. — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“To this day, all I know is there are between two and four openings down there and that the set up inside looks vaguely… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
Wafah Dufour bin Laden, niece of Osama bin Laden has signed a contract to star in a reality show... called Skating with the Nieces… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image