“Hey, Trash, what did old lady Semple say when you torched her pension check?” — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“PRECOGNITION, TELEPATHY, BULLSHIT! EAT MY DONG, YOU EXTRASENSORY TURKEY!” — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“Dad-a-jum, dad-a-jiggers, goddam lobsters bit off your fingers," King said, and actually laughed.” — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“I pointed at Wireman's forehead. "This is your brain," I said. Then I pointed at my easel. "This is your brain on… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“Pam's father had been diagnosed with rectal cancer. It didn't surprise me. Put a bunch of white assholes together and you're going… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
You can't deny laughter; when it comes, it plops down in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants. — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“To the champ, everything is serious business. I'm hoping that he'll live long enough to learn that in this world that is… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“I know they say that a stiff dick has no conscience, but I tell you now that some cunts have teeth...” — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“That thing about don't look up here, you're pissing on your shoes, for instance, was that humor? Or a growl of rage?… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“The Disney parks are scripted, and I hate that. Hate it. I think what they are doing down there in Orlando is… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“I’ll be back as quick as I can,” I said awkwardly. “Sure.” “Stay cool.” “Don’t worry, I’m not going to punch anybody.”… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
Laughter... is like a hurricane: once it reaches a certain point, it becomes self-feeding, self-supporting. You laugh not because the jokes are… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“The newest animal Route 5 had used up, it seemed, was my daughter’s beloved pet. We buried Smucky in the pet sematary.… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
American grammar doesn't have the sturdiness of British grammar (a British advertising man with a proper education can make magazine copy for… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“You’re a goddam funny kid, Clivey,” he said. “I got sixteen grandchildren, and there’s only two of em that I think is… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“Say, darling, I'm giving you this wonderful present, it's a machine that eats at one end and shits out the other, it's… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“When you're twenty-one, life is a roadmap. It's only when you get to twenty-five or so that you begin to suspect you've… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“I have seen many cases like N. during the five years I've been in practice. I sometimes picture these unfortunates as men… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“Bill nodded, but he didn’t look hopeful. “The H-H-Himalayans had a rih-hi-hitual to g-get rih-rid of i-i-it, but ih-it’s pretty gruh-gruh-gruesome.” They… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“...it was another year or two before I discovered that drat and draft were different words. During that same period I remember… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“By now I am sure you have guessed Peter's plan of escape, because you know a good deal more than Peyna did… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
There is a relationship between humor and fear. Think of all the gags you ever heard that have to do with dismemberment,… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
When machines fail, when technology fails, when the conventional religion fails, people have got to have something. Even a zombin lurching through… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“Luck was a joke. Even good luck was just bad luck with its hair combed.” — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“I'm going out for a bottle of champagne. We're going to get bombed.” — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“Molly was a helluva nice girl, but her fried eggs looked like broiled assholes.” — Stephen King Copy Share Image
Shall there be truth between us, as two men? Not as friends, but as enemies and equals? — Stephen King Copy Share Image
The worst advice? 'Don't listen to the critics.' I think that you really ought to listen to the critics, because sometimes they're telling you… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“October 3, 2017 The clown, Hagarty said, looked like a cross between Ronald McDonald and that old TV clown, Bozo—or so he thought at… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“Eddie saw great things and near misses. Albert Einstein as a child, not quite struck by a run-away milk-wagon as he crossed a street.… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
It hurt, of course, but more often than not the best things do, I've found. — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“The idea that creative endeavor and mind-altering substances are entwined is one of the great pop-intellectual myths of our time... Creative people probably do… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“The sun had burned through and the day had gone from dull to dazzling, yet in the west blask-satin thunderheads continued to stack up.… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“God, you had enough time to have been through it three times. You've been through my stuff. I bet you over and let one… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“Flakes of snow swirled and danced across the porch. The Overlook faced it as it had for nearly three-quarters of a century, its darkened… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“In that instant it all seemed to come clear to him- it came in a grisly flash of light, and he realized that the… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
Who gets to be best-liked in any community? Who is the most trusted? Why, the man who does the dirty job, of course, and… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“¿Lo ves, tonto? Volvió a regañarse. Tú lo inventaste todo, gato asustado. No fue más que tu imaginación, gato asustado, gato asustado... No te… — Stephen King Copy Share Image