Kids Quotes by Jay Leno

The car was the iPhone of the 20th century. Kids these days don't have to drive anymore. They just go there virtually.

— Jay Leno

Wasn't it thrilling when the U.S. Women's team took home the gold in gymnastics? A group of American teenagers getting a higher…

— Jay Leno

Halloween's coming. Kids get very imaginative in my neighborhood. Last year, three kids showed up as Goldman Sachs executives and demanded 4.5…

— Jay Leno

Corporations complained about [safety] regulations, but let's face it, people walk away from accidents now that would have killed them when I…

— Jay Leno

That American Taliban kid Johnny Walker was indicted today. Ten counts of terrorism. He could get 5 life sentences. In Taliban terms,…

— Jay Leno

I was born the day I got my license. When I was a kid, if I wanted to go somewhere and see…

— Jay Leno

President Bush said that our kids must be taught how to read. He said if his aides never learned to read, they'd…

— Jay Leno

How would it be if we discovered that aliens only stopped by earth to let their kids take a leak?

— Jay Leno

President Obama told a group of school children that broccoli was his favorite food, and they believed him. Then he told them…

— Jay Leno

Hillary Clinton's opponent in the U.S. Senate race, the Republican she's going to be running against, has been married three times, had…

— Jay Leno

California Governor Gray Davis visited an elementary school here in Los Angeles where he taught a class. I don't want to say…

— Jay Leno

Scientists are complaining that the new dinosaur movie shows dinosaurs with lemurs, who didn't evolve for another million years. They're afraid the…

— Jay Leno

More and more details coming out now about spoiled rich kid Osama bin Laden. Time reports this week he was one of…

— Jay Leno

Did you hear about this 20-year-old kid named John Walker from Northern California who was apparently fighting for the Taliban?... It didn't…

— Jay Leno

John Kerry was the big winner in Iowa. Ted Kennedy introduced Kerry as the 'comeback kid.' That used to be Bill Clinton's…

— Jay Leno

I guess you heard about this; the U.S. Olympic Committee is coming under fire after it was revealed that the uniforms for…

— Jay Leno

Remember when we used to worry about some weirdo having a razor blade inside an apple on Halloween? Not anymore. Like a…

— Jay Leno

This Osama bin Laden guy, spoiled rich kid worth $300M. I have three words for this guy: Anna Nicole Smith. We send…

— Jay Leno

Here's an uplifting story. Congratulations to the Little League team from Huntington Beach, California. Yeah, they beat Japan to win the Little…

— Jay Leno

More details coming out about Michael Jackson. It seems his 13-year-old accuser testified before a grand jury that Michael had seven locks…

— Jay Leno