I was at Michael Jackson's house, and this kid runs out, 'Wait, save me!' — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
If a kid calls his grandma "Mommy" and his mama "Pam", he's going to jail! — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
My kids don't have a trust fund, they have a debt fund. Oh my God, they're $4 million in the hole. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I was bused to a school in Gerritsen Beach in Brooklyn in 1972. I was one of the first black kids in… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
They're working their way down. Next year, Todd Bridges gets the award. When I was a kid I wanted to be Eddie… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You know, you get famous and you work in these weird jobs and you don't have a lot in common with people.… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
There's no interference in stand-up. It's all the things it's hard to get in film: I get to have a wife, I… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
My dad worked every day. I didn't get into show business to work every day. So the fact that most days I… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
It's my real name. My mother's name is Rose Rock. It was the worst name as a kid to have. They called… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Does having a wife and kids change your act? Yes, but only in the best way. It gives you weight and authority.… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
When you have kids, there's no such thing as quality time. There's just time. There's no, 'Ooh, his graduation's better than going… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Success is just hanging out with my kids. I mean, I always say if you have options, you're rich. To me, success… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I always say about my daughters, they save me from my miserable self. They take me out, you know, a comedian, you… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Kids raised on a culture of ‘We’re not going to keep score in the game because we don’t want anybody to lose.’… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
All people naturally hate. My kid bites people now. I didn't teach my kid to bite anybody. Kids say mean stuff. Only… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
That's all we had when I was a kid: Robitussin. No matter what you got, Robitussin better handle it. "Daddy, I got… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Kids always act up the most before they go to sleep. And when I see the Tea Party and all this stuff,… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
So, to say Obama is progress is saying that he’s the first black person that is qualified to be president. That’s not… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
If you live with a single parent, you don't see compromise. You witness a grown person living in a world where they do what… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Nobody ever says, 'Hey daddy, thanks for knockin' out this rent.' 'Hey daddy, I sure love this hot water.' 'Hey daddy, it's easy to… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and the best… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You can't think the thoughts you want to think if you think you're being watched. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
There's not one reference in that thing that doesn't play. People deal with emotions in music all the time, but comedians are always talking… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
My mother got sick when I was rich. And my mother, you know … I don’t really want to get into it, but my… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Here's the thing. When we talk about race relations in America or racial progress, it's all nonsense. There are no race relations. White people… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I was raised to believe that you had to do things better than white people in order to succeed. The old black shows were… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
