You can't fake comedy - it's not like a movie, where a director can just cast a pretty face. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I think all the funny people were bullied. When they talk about outlawing bullying, it's like, what? You want no Comedy Central? — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Guys play characters that won't grow up and something catastrophic happens and they have to grow up to save the day -… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
When a musical act performs, the black audience goes crazy for all the stuff, the album cuts, everything. White audiences, they're nice… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I don't think my comedy is that political. It's more social. But whatever. When you make comedy and you do stand-up, you… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
If you can keep your son off the pipe and your daughter off the pole, you're ahead of the game. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Stand-up comedy is like the lowest medium in all of show business in levels of respect. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I never watched the Oscars. Come on, it's a fashion show . . . What straight black man sits there and watches… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
A comedy club is a place where you work out material, you're trying material. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
A comedian has to live in his head. All this comedy comes from a lonely place. When you're surrounded by an entourage,… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Farrakhan got everybody together for the Million Man March and everything. But Farrakhan don't like the Jews. Which is bugged. I get… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I had always been - everybody kind of likes comedy. I was very interested in comedy, beyond just liking it. I had… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I want my name to be a brand in comedy. I hope my name stands for comedic excellence. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
We got so much food in America we're allergic to food. Allergic to food! Hungry people ain't allergic to shit. You think… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I pride myself on being the guy who can do Def Comedy Jam and Charlie Rose. And do well on both. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
That's all we had when I was a kid: Robitussin. No matter what you got, Robitussin better handle it. "Daddy, I got… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I'll go back to comedy clubs when they get a real no-camera policy, the same way they did with smoking. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
It's weird with stand-up comedy. It doesn't really translate worldwide. I want to figure out how do I make it worldwide. Do… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
When I started out in comedy, it was common knowledge that it took about 10 years to get good. And that was… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Most parts in comedy, they're not really written for men. They're written for, like, these boy-men. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I don't believe I can offend you in a comedy club. I don't believe I can offend you in a concert. A… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
When you make comedy, you make it for the people and you try to have as many screenings and as many tests… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
If you live with a single parent, you don't see compromise. You witness a grown person living in a world where they do what… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Nobody ever says, 'Hey daddy, thanks for knockin' out this rent.' 'Hey daddy, I sure love this hot water.' 'Hey daddy, it's easy to… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and the best… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You can't think the thoughts you want to think if you think you're being watched. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
There's not one reference in that thing that doesn't play. People deal with emotions in music all the time, but comedians are always talking… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
My mother got sick when I was rich. And my mother, you know … I don’t really want to get into it, but my… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Here's the thing. When we talk about race relations in America or racial progress, it's all nonsense. There are no race relations. White people… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I was raised to believe that you had to do things better than white people in order to succeed. The old black shows were… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
