You can't think the thoughts you want to think if you think you're being watched. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I took my AlDS test. You start reflecting... You start thinking about every nasty, skank-ass... It's like the movie Scrooge, and the… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You're not famous unless people's mothers know who you are. Everybody else, you think you're famous, but you're just hot, and heat… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I think if I were to get as big as I could get, it does change your mind-state. I think like the… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I love my life, but I don't think I'm any happier than my younger brother Andre, who drives a garbage truck. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I don't write jokes first. I write down topics. I think of what I want to talk about, and then I write… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I try to stay with it and I try to stay in contact with comedians and just keep comedians in my life… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Actually, I think all addiction starts with soda. Every junkie did soda first. But no one counts that. Maybe they should. The… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You don’t need no gun control, you know what you need? We need some bullet control. Men, we need to control the… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I don't think my comedy is that political. It's more social. But whatever. When you make comedy and you do stand-up, you… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
My first year on 'SNL', I made $90,000 dollars. And I bought a red Corvette for $45,000 dollars. I'm thinking, 'I've got… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
The thing that surprised me the most is just how much money women that weren't rich were paying for their hair. When… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
There are a lot of good comics, no doubt, but as far as the quality of the comics goes, I think what… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I was raised to believe that you had to do things better than white people in order to succeed. The old black… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I think it’s better to have ideas. You can change an idea; changing a belief is trickier. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I think all the funny people were bullied. When they talk about outlawing bullying, it's like, what? You want no Comedy Central? — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
All you crazy white people "I'm American!", all you did was come out of your mother's pussy on American soil. That's it.… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You'd got a baseball game, or a football game, basketball game, "USA! USA! USA!" Hey, calm down! Got a little German on… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I know what you're thinking: why is Chris Rock bagging groceries? But I dropped out of high school in the tenth grade,… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I get approached to do shows all the time. There's a lot of money in sitcoms, but I've never been the kind… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Are they real fires? Or are people just reacting to something? Just because there’s an alarm going doesn’t mean it’s a fire.… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
If you live with a single parent, you don't see compromise. You witness a grown person living in a world where they do what… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Nobody ever says, 'Hey daddy, thanks for knockin' out this rent.' 'Hey daddy, I sure love this hot water.' 'Hey daddy, it's easy to… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and the best… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You can't think the thoughts you want to think if you think you're being watched. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
There's not one reference in that thing that doesn't play. People deal with emotions in music all the time, but comedians are always talking… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
My mother got sick when I was rich. And my mother, you know … I don’t really want to get into it, but my… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Here's the thing. When we talk about race relations in America or racial progress, it's all nonsense. There are no race relations. White people… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I was raised to believe that you had to do things better than white people in order to succeed. The old black shows were… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
