I've been married for 10 years and, you know, it's hard, you spruce it up and you go places. How do you… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
If you told me two years I would miss the greatest basketball game ever to hang out with Nathan Lane, I'd say,… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Artistically I'm curious. But in life? No. I can go to a restaurant and order the same thing for 10 years. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Black History Month is in the shortest month of the year, and the coldest-just in case we want to have a parade — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
They're working their way down. Next year, Todd Bridges gets the award. When I was a kid I wanted to be Eddie… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I never had the confidence to say I was going to be in front of the camera as a comedian until I… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
After I left high school and got my GED, I studied broadcast journalism for a year at a community college. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
A black man will be elected President of the United States. I'm sorry, that's in the year 10,000. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I never wanted to churn it out. Comedians tend to work all the time. They never put it down like musicians who… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You know, some people say life is short and that you could get hit by a bus at any moment and that… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
So there's a cloud of rage around me, but being an artist kind of changes that. No matter what you thought coming… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
We Americans commercialize everything. Look at what we did to Christmas. Christmas is Jesus' birthday. Now, I don't know Jesus, but from… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I've told Michael Jackson jokes. If you got really technical, you could say those are jokes about child molestation. You could, if… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
So, to say Obama is progress is saying that he’s the first black person that is qualified to be president. That’s not… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
People say, 'Why is he bored with her?' Because he's a human being, that's why; same way his wife is bored with… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Nobody's good. I hate it. I truly hate it. I mean, there's a lot of guys doing stuff I admire, but stand-up-wise… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
It used to take years to become a junkie. But crack cut that down to 37 minutes. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
When I started out in comedy, it was common knowledge that it took about 10 years to get good. And that was… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Early in my career it was very important that I gain the reputation. I haven't been on the road in two or… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Black people have been qualified to be president for hundreds of years. George Washington Carver could have been president. I could go… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I'm like the Hulk on stage. It's way over the top. That's Bizarro Chris. Sometimes I get off stage and go What… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I've been away from my two daughters at a very important time in their life.'I have missed most of Girl Scout cookie… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
If you live with a single parent, you don't see compromise. You witness a grown person living in a world where they do what… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Nobody ever says, 'Hey daddy, thanks for knockin' out this rent.' 'Hey daddy, I sure love this hot water.' 'Hey daddy, it's easy to… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and the best… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You can't think the thoughts you want to think if you think you're being watched. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
There's not one reference in that thing that doesn't play. People deal with emotions in music all the time, but comedians are always talking… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
My mother got sick when I was rich. And my mother, you know … I don’t really want to get into it, but my… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Here's the thing. When we talk about race relations in America or racial progress, it's all nonsense. There are no race relations. White people… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I was raised to believe that you had to do things better than white people in order to succeed. The old black shows were… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
