No matter what kind of backgrounds two men are from, if you go, 'Hey, man, women are crazy,' you've got a friend. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Men lie the most, women tell the biggest lies... a man's lie is, "I'm at Tony house, I was at Kenny house!"… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Men are handicapped when it comes to arguing, 'cause we have a need to make sense. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
If you see a black woman with an overweight white man, you know she got effed up credit! — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Shaq is rich. The white man who signs his check... is wealthy. "Ah, here you go, Shaq. Go buy yourself a bouncing… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
A black man will be elected President of the United States. I'm sorry, that's in the year 10,000. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Don't argue! You cannot win, you cannot beat a woman in a arguement. It's impossble you will not win. Cause men, we… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Whatever your pleasure, I can facilitate. You need weed, you need meth - hey, you need Prozac, I'm your man. I know… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I never watched the Oscars. Come on, it's a fashion show . . . What straight black man sits there and watches… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Whatever your woman is into, you better be into. Whatever your man is into, you better be N2. Your partner into church,… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Every man has to settle down eventually. You know why you gotta settle down eventually? Because you don't want to be the… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I think if I were to get as big as I could get, it does change your mind-state. I think like the… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
In the world of animation, you can be anything you wanna be. If you’re a fat woman, you can play a skinny… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
The government hates rap. That's why they don't arrest anybody that kills rappers! Only the good ones are dead, man! Only the… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Farrakhan got everybody together for the Million Man March and everything. But Farrakhan don't like the Jews. Which is bugged. I get… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You don’t need no gun control, you know what you need? We need some bullet control. Men, we need to control the… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
My mother got sick when I was rich. And my mother, you know … I don’t really want to get into it,… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Only black people in the whole neighborhood, so let's break it down: Me, I'm a decent comedian, I'm a'ight. Mary J. Blige,… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
White man makes guns? No problem. Black rapper says "gun"? Congressional hearing. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You cannot win in a fight against women, cause men have a need to make sense — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
See, the Black man gotta fly to get to something the white man can walk to. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
It's hard for a man to turn down sex... if they chase us, we can't run that fast. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Most parts in comedy, they're not really written for men. They're written for, like, these boy-men. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Black people have been qualified to be president for hundreds of years. George Washington Carver could have been president. I could go… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
My relationship with my daughter is gonna affect her relationship with men for the rest of her life... Sometimes I'm walking with… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
There's no interference in stand-up. It's all the things it's hard to get in film: I get to have a wife, I… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Even if you meet the perfect person, it ain’t gonna be at the perfect time. You’re married, they’re single. That’s right. You’re… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
See Relationships are hard, man. For order, for any relationship to work, both people have to be on the same page, both… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
If you live with a single parent, you don't see compromise. You witness a grown person living in a world where they do what… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Nobody ever says, 'Hey daddy, thanks for knockin' out this rent.' 'Hey daddy, I sure love this hot water.' 'Hey daddy, it's easy to… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and the best… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You can't think the thoughts you want to think if you think you're being watched. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
There's not one reference in that thing that doesn't play. People deal with emotions in music all the time, but comedians are always talking… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
My mother got sick when I was rich. And my mother, you know … I don’t really want to get into it, but my… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Here's the thing. When we talk about race relations in America or racial progress, it's all nonsense. There are no race relations. White people… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I was raised to believe that you had to do things better than white people in order to succeed. The old black shows were… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
