Hillary Clinton's opponent in the U.S. Senate race, the Republican she's going to be running against, has been married three times, had… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Forty million Americans smoked marijuana; the only ones who didn’t like it were Judge Ginsberg, Clarence Thomas and Bill Clinton. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The report on climate change said that humans are very likely making the planet warmer. To which Hillary Clinton said, 'Hey, can't… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Isn't this amazing? Clinton is getting $8M for his memoir, Hillary got $8M for her memoir. That is $16M for two people… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Well, the big story -- Hillary Clinton will be running for president in 2008. You know why I think she's running? I… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
John Kerry was the big winner in Iowa. Ted Kennedy introduced Kerry as the 'comeback kid.' That used to be Bill Clinton's… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Clinton and President Obama played a round of golf over the weekend. President Clinton asked Obama what his handicap was, and… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
I guess we didn't even officially apologize. Jesse Jackson called on the United States to officially apologize to the Chinese. Jesse said,… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
People made a big deal out of the fact this is the first time a sitting president has done a late-night show.… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
They say if the warming trend continues, by 2015 Hillary Clinton might actually thaw out. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton is now facing a kind of personal dilemma. She can't decide whether to drop the name Clinton from… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Bush is smart. I don't think that Bush will ever be impeached, 'cause unlike Clinton, Reagan, or even his father, George W.… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
John Kerry is recovering nicely after having prostate surgery. But the doctors did tell him it would be several months before he… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Bin Laden was once targeted by President Clinton. President Clinton wanted to kill him but couldn't get him. Of course not, we… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Hillary Clinton said that her childhood dream was to be an Olympic athlete. But she was not athletic enough. She said she… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
While visiting Kenya, former President Clinton was offered 40 goats and 20 cows for his daughter, Chelsea, by a love struck government… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Clinton's pet Labrador, Buddy, is getting neutered. The dog will never have sex again. Overnight, they've turned Buddy from a Democrat into… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Bush fell off his mountain bike down on his ranch in Texas. A couple weeks ago, John Kerry fell off his… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
President Bush and Bill Clinton both agree that cloning is morally wrong. Clinton said that he thinks humans should be made the… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Now, today is the day we honor, of course, the Presidents, ranging from George Washington, who couldn't tell a lie, to George… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
When Clinton said he was going to create 8 million new jobs, I didn't think they were all going to be tax collectors. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
At the G-20 summit, the White House accidentally listed a phone-sex line for journalists seeking an on-record briefing call for Secretary of… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Hillary Clinton is getting a little bit of controversy because she has the most expensive hometown office rent - over $500,000 a… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Bill Clinton is the only ex-president who hasn't planned his own funeral. But, in his defense, in the past he has said… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
As you may have heard, former President Bill Clinton says he's coming here to California to help Governor Gray Davis in his… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
If you restore a car, and you're making money, then you're doing it wrong. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
There is a nationwide shortage of drugs for Attention Deficit Disorder. The FDA says they're not sure how it happened. I guess somebody wasn't… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
“Leno said the rainy weather in California "couldn't have come at a worse possible time. Today was the day NBC was supposed to burn… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Donald Trump said he will not decide about a possible run for the presidency until after the current season of Celebrity Apprentice wraps up.… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
American forces in Iraq found $650 million in American cash sealed in a hidden cottage. See, this is why President Bush wants to invade… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
I wanted to have a career in sports when I was young, but I had to give up the idea. I'm only six feet… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
Texas Gov. Rick Perry referred to the Mexican city of Juarez as the most dangerous city in America. In his defense, he probably just… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The Mayans have predicted the world is supposed to end on December 21. If the world doesn't end on December 21, you can bet… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The Globe reports that North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il raises money by selling fake Viagra pills. What it is about this guy? None of… — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
