I respect a woman's decision to undergo plastic surgery to go from being ugly to being ugly & disgusting. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Spending a long time writing a really long message then accidentally pressing the back button. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Many people dying from natural causes. Forget Aids and Cancer, we need a cure for natural causes. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Every 6 seconds somewhere a woman is sexually unfulfilled. Every 5 seconds somewhere a man knows it too. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
When I was young I was afraid of dark, Now when I get my electricity bill I'm afraid of light. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Ladies, if you're ugly get a bunch of tattoos. They're hot and it'll distract guys from your fucked up face. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I think it's time to clean out your Fridge when you open the door and something reaches out and hands you a… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Stop, look, listen Great advice not only for crossing the road, but also when you're mid-wink and suspect your wife is home. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Even when it's not the best of days, you can always tell yourself, hey, at least I'm not the person who sank… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
You know you deserve someone better when the one youve always fought for is also the one youve always cried for. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
LADIES: You should never beg for a guys commitment to you . If he wants you, he'll do whatever it takes to… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
When you're given a second chance, it's because God thought it was funny when you screwed up the first time and He… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Nostalgia is a dirty liar that insists things were better than they seemed — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Tell your girlfriend how much you love her out of the blue one day. I bet she'll love it. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
The problem is that as much as I cant force you to love me, I cant force myself to stop loving you. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
The less make up you have on the more attractive you become. I don't make the rules. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Valentine's Day is only three weeks away. So remember, it's not too late to break-up. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
The first step in going somewhere is deciding you are not going to stay where you are. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
When I was a kid I always imagined myself waking up to & sleeping to a social networking website. Dreams do come true. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
This time of year is tough on many people. Help'em out by shouting SHUT UP as often as possible. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I wonder if you have unprotected phone sex if you can get hearing aids? — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Women fake headaches to get out of having sex with their man, and men fake not being married to have sex with a woman. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I've been told by so many women that I'm a great listener. A majority of them, have big boobs. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Scientists have found that women share the same dna as prawns.. Their heads are full of shit but their pink bits taste amazing! — Green Monk Copy Share Image
When someone is mad and asks you Do I look stupid? Don't answer them just stare curiously at them — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Passion is a strong emotional desire of love and hate to humans or objects — Green Monk Copy Share Image
You may love a girl very deeply... But u CANNOT express it more deeper than... 5, 6 or 7 inches... — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Note To Females: You cant blame the entire male genre just because you were attracted to some assholes. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you can't understand what someone has said even though they have repeated it four times — Green Monk Copy Share Image
