There are two greatest days in a guys life.... The day he was BORN..... and the day he discovered PORN... — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Ex's are like toys you give them to the less fortunate so you can move on to bigger and better things ! — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Stop checking your phone nobody loves you! - me at the cinema to anyone checking their phone — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Happiness Is Like Penis. It Always Looks Small But When You Learn To Share It, You Realize How Big It Can Be. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
The Shortest Solution Of Every Problem Is To Minimize The Distance Between Your Knee And Floor. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
To those who know and love me I wish you well. All the rest may go to hell — Green Monk Copy Share Image
A news paper seems more intresting when . . . The person sitting next to you is reading it... — Green Monk Copy Share Image
That one person who you know you can't trust, but keep telling them everything, anyway. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Twitter is like a maximum security prison. There are the tough guys, crazy ones, odd ones & an idiot who tried to… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I understand the weight of love. As soon as you fall in love she continually starts to get heavier — Green Monk Copy Share Image
A wise black man once told me... do you have any spare change you can give me? — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Whenever I kill a spider in my house I leave it's guts smeared on the wall to let all the other spider… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Beware of ego: Ego is a double edged sword the outer edge cuts your popularity; while the inner edge pierces your purity. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I can read Spanish, German, Italian, and French¦ as long as its written in English :] — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Best thing about social networking is how it brings us all together so we can have lunch with our phone. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Life is like sex, you can either lie back and let it screw you OR you can get on top and ride… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
My wife told me she wanted something with lots of diamonds, I bought her a deck of cards — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Its really so funny that people who treat me like shit get offended when me finally do the same to them. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
When I grow up I want to be just like my dog. Walking around fucking bitches... then when I get bored, I… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I wonder if you have unprotected phone sex if you can get hearing aids? — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Women fake headaches to get out of having sex with their man, and men fake not being married to have sex with a woman. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I've been told by so many women that I'm a great listener. A majority of them, have big boobs. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Scientists have found that women share the same dna as prawns.. Their heads are full of shit but their pink bits taste amazing! — Green Monk Copy Share Image
When someone is mad and asks you Do I look stupid? Don't answer them just stare curiously at them — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Passion is a strong emotional desire of love and hate to humans or objects — Green Monk Copy Share Image
You may love a girl very deeply... But u CANNOT express it more deeper than... 5, 6 or 7 inches... — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Note To Females: You cant blame the entire male genre just because you were attracted to some assholes. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you can't understand what someone has said even though they have repeated it four times — Green Monk Copy Share Image
