Funny Quote by Steven Wright Download Open image “I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.” — Steven Wright ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 4.7 out of 5 (7 ratings) Copy quoteShare Funny Humor
Some mechanics be like 'I COULDN'T REPAIR YOUR BREAK, SO I MADE YOUR HORN LOUDER' — Rotr Humphery Ken Ilorah Copy Share Image
I changed my car horn sound to gun shots, people move out of the way much faster now. — Itsme867 Copy Share Image
Blow your own horn loud. If you succeed, people will forgive your noise; if you fail, they'll forget it. — William Feather Copy Share Image
“It’s important to understand that in the Third World most driving is done with the horn, or “Egyptian Brake Pedal,” as it is known. There is a precise and complicated etiquette of horn use. Honk your horn only under the following circumstances: 1. When anything blocks the road 2. When anything doesn’t. 3. When anything might. 4. At red lights… — P.J. O'Rourke Copy Share
I am a gifted absent-minded person who honks the horn at speed breakers / speed bumps. — Mohit Sharma Copy Share Image
I lay my head on the wheel and the horn begins honking, the whole neighborhood knows that I'm home drunk again. — George Jones Copy Share Image
I shaved my commute time in half by changing my car's horn to sound like gunfire. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you can do something and not blow your own horn, it sure sounds a lot better. — Don Meyer Copy Share Image
Tooting my own horn is of no interest to me... it takes you away from real life. It's a waste, and I don't find… — Paul Stanley Copy Share Image
My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked,… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
Nobody can really compare a relationship in which the victim is 15 years old to one where she's 6. While both criminal, they're very different circumstances. — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
It's very intense to be in front of a live audience. It's just an amazing experience. It's dangerous. Everything out there is heightened. The… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
I got pulled over by a cop, and he said, 'do you know the speed limit here is 55 miles per hour?'. So I… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
Babies don't need a vacation, but I still see them at the beach... it pisses me off! I'll go over to a little baby… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
“I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed reading accident. I hit a book mark and flew across the room.” — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
When I'm on stage, it's really intense. My mind is going a million miles an hour, trying to remember my act, trying to say… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
I don't like politicians, and I don't like politics. I definitely don't want to be associated with any of them. — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
When you step out and do a song in a musical, the easier thing to do is make it funny. But when those transitions… — Kelli O'Hara Copy Share Image
It's a hard thing to describe. It's just this sense that you got something to say. — Jonah Lehrer Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Congratulations to Facebook on going public with all my private information... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you were to send a werewolf to the moon, would he be a werewolf permanently? — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
