“Things aren’t often what they appear to be at first blush. But embarrassment is.” — Jarod Kintz Shame Copy Share Image
“On second thought, maybe “Penis on a Stick Ice Cream Parlor” is not such a good name for a business—even an ice… — Jarod Kintz Day care Copy Share Image
“I’m creative, I make up almost everything. But with all my creativity, I couldn’t make up with my wife.” — Jarod Kintz Creativity Copy Share Image
“I bought a big brown stuffed animal. You know, for dinner.” — Jarod Kintz Stuffed animal Copy Share Image
“If I went into the prosthetic limb business, I’d charge an arm and a leg.” — Jarod Kintz Business Copy Share Image
“A part-time worker is fully employed, half the time. In other words, they are part-time unemployees.” — Jarod Kintz Time Copy Share Image
“When I wear sunglasses, the day turns shades of night, and it’s as if the blocking of the sun to my eyes… — Jarod Kintz Sun Copy Share Image
“I make art for one person and one person only. And as soon as I find that one person, I sure hope… — Jarod Kintz Art Copy Share Image
“How many birthdays can you fit in a shoebox? I guess that depends both on how old you are, and what size… — Jarod Kintz Birthday Copy Share Image
“I’ve gone astray. It’s better to cook with a stray than eat your own cat.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“It’s interesting to watch someone think. Glass skulls would be cool.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“She tried to steal the desert. She’s guilty. Look no farther than her camel toe.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“He wouldn’t even understand dry wit if you dropped him off in the desert with a canteen full of sand and a… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I was forced to eat crow. I was so embarrassed that I would have eaten any other bird, including ostrich.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I stepped on a banana spider today. I didn't crush it, but I did slip and fall. Then I got bit by… — Jarod Kintz Three stooges Copy Share Image
“In the late afternoon sky, the moon had the smoky hue of the hazy horizon, and the matching clouds looked like faint… — Jarod Kintz Late afternoon Copy Share Image
“I asked if I could draw on her face, because not only was her head globe-shaped, but her nose was shaped like… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A brick could be used as the lead singer of a band called “The More Interesting Than.” I would say get Miley… — Jarod Kintz Leadership Copy Share Image
“I took some naked pictures the other day. I don’t feel shamed, but I do feel remorse over having to steal the… — Jarod Kintz Regret Copy Share Image
“I asked myself a question, but I wouldn’t answer, because it was too personal. I wish I had a clone, so he… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“If instead of a handshake you hold out a fist for a fist bump, I’ll wrap my hand around your fist like… — Jarod Kintz Hot and cold Copy Share Image
“A karate black belt would make a great blindfold on a kidnap victim, after you karate chop them into submission.” — Jarod Kintz Black belt Copy Share Image
