A lot of the kind of comedy that I do comes out of real human moments. For them to work, they have… — Brian Regan Copy Share Image
“Bashere shrugged, grinning brhind his grey-streaked moustaches, "When I first slept in a saddle, Muad Cheade was Marshal-General. The man was as… — Robert Jordan Copy Share Image
“The tree man eulogized them by screaming, 'And now get the hell out of here with your tree, you lousy bastards.' Francie… — Betty Smith Copy Share Image
“When someone detonates a suicide bomb, that person does not have career prospects.” — P.J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
People who have very devastating lives sometimes have the most wild, avant-garde humor. It's like when you've seen it all and been… — Jenny Zhang Copy Share Image
When I was 14, I saw someone getting their face and wrists slashed with a knife in a pub in Catford. Nobody… — Noel Fielding Copy Share Image
“I am so freaked our right now, you could pull a clown out of my ass and I wouldn't be at all… — John Green Copy Share Image
Sometimes I fall asleep at night with my clothes on. I'm going to have all my clothes made out of blankets. — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
Americans to bow our heads in humility before our Heavenly Father, a God who calls us not to judge our neighbors, but… — George W. Bush Copy Share Image
I love comedy, but it has to be hysterical and really amusing; I'm not really a big fan of romantic comedies, in… — Rachel Hurd-Wood Copy Share Image
Humor has to surprise us; otherwise, it isn't funny. It's a death knell for a writer to be labeled a humorist because… — Garrison Keillor Copy Share Image
“The growth of intimacy is like that. First one gives off his best picture, the bight and finished product mended with bluff… — F. Scott Fitzgerald Copy Share Image
“Dolphins and sharks are natural enemies. Dolphins are like, "Quit eating us," and sharks are like, "Stop smiling all the time, you… — Dan Florence Copy Share Image
“Personally, I don't think that having a water goddess for an ancestress is a guarantee of freedom against seasickness, nor come to… — Philippa Gregory Copy Share Image
“It probably wasn’t entirely her fault that she was such a bitter person. Having a name like Grace can be a serious… — Sorin Suciu Copy Share Image
I'd love to be in a feature film, and I don't just mean in a starring role - it could be a… — Barbara Mandrell Copy Share Image
I suddenly recall the arpeggios of laughter lilting across the tender, springtime grass-gay-welling, far-floating, fluent, spontaneous, a bell-like feminine fluting, then suppressed;… — Ralph Ellison Copy Share Image
A general truth is to have a good sense of humor. Roll with the punches of life's ups and downs. Laughing at… — Jill Abramson Copy Share Image
“Blood and I have an unspoken agreement. It stays inside the body, and I don’t throw up. Once it escapes, the agreement… — Nicolette Pierce Copy Share Image
I wish it was that easy to get turned on for me - at this point, I need a bottle of Belevere… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
If someone is genuine, compassionate and kind, that is a turn-on. A sense of humor is a huge turn on, and that… — Jennifer Nettles Copy Share Image
“Cole?" Sydney asked. Alyssa said, "Now that we know for sure it's a boy, I'm trying out names to see what sounds… — R.E. Butler Copy Share Image
“Whether it is big or small, the size of a poor man’s yard incessantly reminds him that he is poor.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
I admired Stephen Daldry very much; I think he's a brilliant director, and also, I feel close to him because he has… — Max von Sydow Copy Share Image
My dad was a complicated man. He was a huge racist, my dad, but he still tried to be a good father,… — Anthony Jeselnik Copy Share Image
The Devil can so completely assume the human form, when he wants to deceive us, that we may well lie with what… — Martin Luther Copy Share Image
“Don‘t worry: there‘ll come a time when all this will make sense to you. Then your laughter will end to be replaced… — Peer-E-Kamil Copy Share Image
“When you have a healthy self-esteem, qualities such as likeability, confidence, trustworthiness, compassion, sense of humor, empathy, and optimism all serve to… — Susan C. Young Copy Share Image
“She's my best friend, and I know she means well, but as she talks I'm mentally calculating all the ways I could… — Stephanie Campbell Copy Share Image
“I'm very polite by nature, even the voices in my head let each other finish their sentences.” — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“Don't argue with stupid people, they just pull you down to their level and beat you with experience.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“I know that David Tennant's Hamlet isn't till July. And lots of people are going to be doing Dr Who in Hamlet… — Neil Gaiman Copy Share Image
“I alternate between feeling sympathetic toward humanity and being a misanthrope. When I'm sympathetic, it usually means I haven't been around people… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Julie Czerneda's inner editor says, 'One day her expectations will meet reality and actually get along.” — Julie E. Czerneda Copy Share Image
“I ran this through my "girl talk" translator and said, "I could eat him, if either of you'd like. Seems like it… — Lia Habel Copy Share Image
I've always been very open about it. I've been very open about my addiction, about my panic disorder. But I think that… — Jay Mohr Copy Share Image
I wanted to absorb the comedy world by osmosis. But I really loved kind of throwing myself in head first. — Rachel Brosnahan Copy Share Image
“Don't worry, boss,” HARV said. “I get the feeling that this is only the tip of the iceberg of complications.” “HARV, you’re… — John Zakour Copy Share Image
It is a curious fact, but a fact it is, that your witty people are the most hard-hearted in the world. The… — Letitia Elizabeth Landon Copy Share Image
