“I’d urge you to stay away from any and all martial arts practitioners for the time being.” — Graham Parke Art Copy Share Image
“Another terrible night. Neighbor was busy with his hamsters again” — Graham Parke Hamsters Copy Share Image
“I'm not sure my belly button is exactly in the middle. I wonder what that means..” — Graham Parke Belly Copy Share Image
“Effectively feeling himself dry out and expire over a period of days.” — Graham Parke Expire Copy Share Image
“what Warren was playing seemed to be a mixture of craps and table tennis.” — Graham Parke Football Copy Share Image
“You’re stuck with yourself for the rest of your life, and now you know, beyond a doubt, that you’re an asshole.” — Graham Parke Asshole Copy Share Image
“My dad gave her the finger, went down to town hall, and took the name of the person in line ahead of… — Graham Parke Town hall Copy Share Image
“standing in front of a building, then not meeting up with a woman, but instead following her home at a distance, that’d… — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“If that’s the case, then maybe you should be looking at people who wanted him dead, not people who needed him to… — Graham Parke Dead people Copy Share Image
“what tipped me off was the pink nighty I was wearing and the abundance of flowers decorating my room.” — Graham Parke Flower Copy Share Image
“I’d mistakenly shown myself to be the kind of guy (test subject) who stood out in her garden wondering about her underwear.” — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“Monday night. Couldn’t sleep. Sounded like my downstairs neighbor was drilling thousands of tiny holes in his ceiling.” — Graham Parke Monday night Copy Share Image
“Joseph Miller had allowed the Universe to reduce him to being someone’s Tuesday afternoon monkey-poop scooper.” — Graham Parke Miller Copy Share Image
“Passed the kitchen and noticed the sandwich. It still had huge chunks of moist, tender chicken breast in it. Didn’t want to… — Graham Parke Food Copy Share Image
“I shouted the perfect words to scare him off. It was just the delivery (and only the delivery) that made me sound… — Graham Parke Comedy Copy Share Image
“Theorized about the possibilities of solving a 500 piece puzzle in one go, simply by taking the pieces from the box in… — Graham Parke Puzzle Copy Share Image
“Just before I look under my bed, I always get a little cold feeling, as if part of me expects to find… — Graham Parke Healthy relationship Copy Share Image
“he’s still dead, but he died this morning rather than last night.” She held up her hand with a small amount of… — Graham Parke Dead Copy Share Image
“Dug up a die and threw it 72 times. Aimed to get as high a total as possible. Tallied the throws knowing… — Graham Parke Time Copy Share Image
“I'm looking into my past lives. I'm convinced some of them still owe me money.” — Graham Parke Humor Copy Share Image
“I think it’s better for customer relations if we all commit to wearing matching socks,” — Graham Parke Socks Copy Share Image
“I was good at creeping around people’s backyards, at night, unseen.” — Graham Parke Creeping Copy Share Image
“Do you ever feel that everything would be okay, if only you had an Irish accent?” — Graham Parke Accent Copy Share Image
“I wore an elaborate disguise that made me look like a caterer from a rivaling company.” — Graham Parke Business Copy Share Image
“it sounds like my neighbor is stir-frying hamsters in a large enameled wok.” — Graham Parke Stir Frying Copy Share Image
“I wasn’t going to have my pressure points fondled unexpectedly.” — Graham Parke Unexpectedly Copy Share Image
“Reputable companies don’t get their test subjects through ads in gaming magazines,” — Graham Parke Gaming Copy Share Image
“Wondered about the experimental drugs interacting with airborne chemicals and leaving me unexpectedly dead.” — Graham Parke Airborne Chemicals Copy Share Image
“Didn’t fall asleep. Spent the better part of the night listening to Warren drill holes in my floor.” — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“It felt a bit like French kissing an old lady; all the right moves, but in totally the wrong places.” — Graham Parke Old lady Copy Share Image
“not knowing what kind of drugs you’re on and thus not knowing what to expect as effects or side effects, is that… — Graham Parke Drugs Copy Share Image
“what was it they called you? It’s on the tip of my tongue. It was something to do with cats and large… — Graham Parke Body fat Copy Share Image
“I knew I should’ve started stalking her first! Damn my not-so-devious brain. When would I learn that women don’t go for nice… — Graham Parke Nice guys Copy Share Image
“So, this guy entered my store, browsed my crap in his suit, sandals, and stickered sombrero, and completely broke my concentration.” — Graham Parke Broke Concentration Copy Share Image
