Funny Quotes by Green Monk · Page 10

Next time you fart, turn to the nearest person and say, Did you hear that asshole talk shit behind my back?

— Green Monk

Me and good judgment haven't been on speaking terms in a good long time.

— Green Monk

If you don't want me to cross the line .. Then don't draw one

— Green Monk

The internet is such a fucking whore.

— Green Monk

A Man's penis is so polite. It stands up so girls have a place to sit down.

— Green Monk

I just want to be successful enough to make others do the work that I'm being paid to do.

— Green Monk

I have one of those open and shut marriages. My pants are always open and my wife's are always shut.

— Green Monk

If I was meant to be controlled, I would have come with a remote

— Green Monk

A wise man among the ignorant is like a beautiful girl in the company of blind men.

— Green Monk

When the library book-drop overflows and volumes spill onto the wet grass, the books are over dew.

— Green Monk

After 10 pegs, I think Im the most interesting person in the world.

— Green Monk

It takes about 35 years for a woman to reach their sexual peak. For a man it takes about 5 to 10 mins

— Green Monk

I em nott a badd speler I juste rite coolr than youe (;

— Green Monk

Relations & Ego both are inter connected The first fails if the second is hurt The second fails if the first succeeds...…

— Green Monk

When your exes see youu happy,moving on with someone else... THAT'S when they want to wiggle their way back into your life.

— Green Monk

We all have that one friend who always gives relationship advice but is still single.

— Green Monk

Women love a nice guy with a sense of humor. To cheer them up when their douchebag boyfriend cheats on them again.…

— Green Monk

You wanna play games; Game On. Just remember, I'm not just a bitch, I am an intelligent bitch and out of your…

— Green Monk

Go to a park with shades on and a hoodie, wait until someone asks you which kid is yours and say I…

— Green Monk

No, I did not want the receipt, but now that you've asked, I'm getting suspicious. So yes please I want it.

— Green Monk

My favorite coffee flavor is HOT.

— Green Monk

I wish we could ctrl...alt...delete parts of life we don't particularly like.

— Green Monk

I don't smoke, I don't drink, I don't snort, and I don't gamble. I do lie a little bit though.

— Green Monk

Life taught me lot of lessons.....But I bunked those classes too...!

— Green Monk

This status is so good you will read it twice this status is so good you just read it twice.

— Green Monk