“Like the Grand Canyon, I care deeply. Hop on a donkey and you’ll see how deeply I love you!” — Jarod Kintz Deeply Copy Share Image
“The mountains are where God proves He’s better than Michelangelo at sculpting.” — Jarod Kintz Michelangelo Copy Share Image
“Today is 8-9-10. August, 9, 2010. So hooray for Chronologically Ascending Day!” — Jarod Kintz Today 10 Copy Share Image
“I want to write a book called “Conversations.” Of course, it’s all talk at this point.” — Jarod Kintz Book Copy Share Image
“Don’t steal because it’s immoral, not because you’re afraid you’ll get caught.” — Jarod Kintz Caught Copy Share Image
“A blanket could be used to trap my love in, before it dissipates out into the world. ” — Jarod Kintz Blanket Copy Share Image
“All I know is I don’t know if I know, and this everlasting oscillation shakes my belief system.” — Jarod Kintz Answers Copy Share Image
“Instead of a motorcycle, why not ride a custom-engineered unicorn? The unicorn could be genetically grown like corn.” — Jarod Kintz Unicorn Copy Share Image
“If I were a parent, I would feel like nudity should not be on the back of any magazine. No, it should… — Jarod Kintz Nudity Copy Share Image
“My last name should be “Why,” because it is my destiny to question everything, including how to change my last name to… — Jarod Kintz Destiny Copy Share Image
“To get a step up in the world, you could use a ladder, or you could use your connections. I prefer the… — Jarod Kintz Ladder Copy Share Image
“I taught my kid brother sign language and then cut off all his fingers. He hasn’t spoken to me since.” — Jarod Kintz Brother Copy Share Image
“I made her late, so she made me dinner. And by late I mean pregnant. And by dinner I mean marry her.” — Jarod Kintz Dinner Copy Share Image
“My ex girlfriend, she gave great log cabin. But she couldn’t write a speech like Lincoln. So I grew a beard and… — Jarod Kintz Beard Copy Share Image
“You can smuggle anything into an event inside empty pizza boxes. Carrying pizza boxes transforms anyone into Moses. There can be a… — Jarod Kintz Food Copy Share Image
“After I had my computer about a month, I finally figured out how to turn it on. (Hint: hitting it in various… — Jarod Kintz Computers Copy Share Image
“A blanket could be used to alert your guest when he’s overstayed his welcome. But what’s even more effective would be a… — Jarod Kintz Blanket Used Copy Share Image
“It’s been said that the most successful people are often early risers. So that’s why I started getting up in the afternoon,… — Jarod Kintz Early Copy Share Image
“Before I die, I want to change my name to "Here," so that my tombstone could simply read, "Here lies." And then… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I want to write a book called, “Son, I’m dying,” where I visualize the day my estranged dad calls me out of… — Jarod Kintz Books Copy Share Image
“I once met a man who couldn't think outside of the box. So one day, while he was thinking, I taped the… — Jarod Kintz Outside the box Copy Share Image
“She always looks like she’s about to break into laughter. He always looks like he’s about to break into her house. I… — Jarod Kintz Buyer Copy Share Image
“Dating is all about getting to know somebody, without wasting a lot of time or money. What is the price of love?… — Jarod Kintz Assembly line Copy Share Image
“Apple is the Ferrari of the computer world. I’m not sure if the “engine” is superior, however, but the frame sure is… — Jarod Kintz Apple Copy Share Image
“If you only had 48 hours left to live, would you spend it like you normally spend your weekends? If not, why… — Jarod Kintz Free time Copy Share Image
“Jarod Kintz was born in Salt Lake City to a family of five. One father, and four mothers. Jarod moved around a… — Jarod Kintz Family Copy Share Image
“Why does Joe Normie think it’s a litmus test for morality if one returns one’s shopping cart? Big-box stores put out of… — Jarod Kintz Business Copy Share Image
“Fredrick gazed into the deep blue eyes of Jackson for a few seconds before answering. “I’d like the best room in the… — Jarod Kintz Room Copy Share Image
“But they soon found out that Robert just wasn’t personable, which isn’t surprising since Robert isn’t a person. While Robert was always… — Jarod Kintz Red light Copy Share Image
“Cap’n is the cuddliest cat this side of the rabbit hole. He’s like a furry lump of clay, because no matter what… — Jarod Kintz Cats Copy Share Image
