Presidential Quotes by Jay Leno

16 Presidential quotes by Jay Leno

Jay Leno’s sixteen observations about presidents are laced with humor and a touch of satire. They offer a light‑hearted yet pointed look at the quirks and expectations of the highest office.

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At a press conference yesterday NASA announced that 2005 was the hottest year on record. It is so hot, and global warming…

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Sen. Joe Biden, on the day of announcing his candidacy for president of the United States, called Barack Obama the first mainstream…

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Republican presidential hopeful Mike Hucka-BS is attacking actress Natalie Portman for getting pregnant without being married. It could get a little awkward…

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In a new issue of Esquire magazine, they revealed that before he was married to Teresa Heinz, Senator John Kerry dated Morgan…

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It really kind of looks like now that John Kerry is on his way to the presidential nomination. The only thing that…

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Experts are saying that President Bush's goal now is to politically humiliate Saddam Hussein. Why don't we just make him the next…

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Yesterday all five living presidents gathered for the opening of the George W. Bush presidential library in Dallas. Well, six living presidents…

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Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry came down pretty hard on fellow candidate Howard Dean this weekend. After Dean misspoke several times, Kerry…

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John Kerry's victory over Howard Dean has completely changed the presidential race around. Now instead of the rich white guy from Yale…

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The New York Times is reporting that back in the '60s, presidential candidate Howard Dean used a letter from a doctor about…

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They say John Kerry is the first Democratic presidential candidate in history to raise $50 million in a three-month period. Actually, that's…

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With the presidential debates right around the corner, John Kerry is going to play Mitt Romney to help the President prepare for…

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The Boston Globe is reporting that Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry used to date actress Morgan Fairchild but it didn't work out.…

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President Obama was in Disney World today where he unveiled his new plan to create jobs. He was joined by Mickey Mouse…

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Presidential Democratic front-runner Howard Dean admitted to Chris Matthews on the 'Hardball' show that he got out of the draft because of…

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Tonight the Republican presidential candidates had a big debate, 10 candidates. The last time that many rich white guys got together, I…

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If you restore a car, and you're making money, then you're doing it wrong.

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Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends…

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Michael Jackson has a new baby boy; no word yet who the father is.

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There is a nationwide shortage of drugs for Attention Deficit Disorder. The FDA says they're not sure how it happened. I guess somebody wasn't…

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“Leno said the rainy weather in California "couldn't have come at a worse possible time. Today was the day NBC was supposed to burn…

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Donald Trump said he will not decide about a possible run for the presidency until after the current season of Celebrity Apprentice wraps up.…

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American forces in Iraq found $650 million in American cash sealed in a hidden cottage. See, this is why President Bush wants to invade…

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I wanted to have a career in sports when I was young, but I had to give up the idea. I'm only six feet…

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Texas Gov. Rick Perry referred to the Mexican city of Juarez as the most dangerous city in America. In his defense, he probably just…

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You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out.

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The Mayans have predicted the world is supposed to end on December 21. If the world doesn't end on December 21, you can bet…

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The Globe reports that North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il raises money by selling fake Viagra pills. What it is about this guy? None of…

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Here is your government at work. A congressman from Colorado said he wants to draft a rule that would make it unethical to have…

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Jack Abramoff is going to testify against some of the other weasels in Congress. A lobbyist testifying against congressmen? How many Bibles are going…

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Tomorrow, America's most famous hockey mom, Sarah Palin, will drop the ceremonial first puck at the Philadelphia Flyers game. Right afterwards, she'll get out…

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