Humor Quotes · Page 98

I, like many young widows, have very well developed gallows humor.

— Carole Radziwill

“Success at sports is the province of the almost empty head.”

— Jonathan Franzen

People are amazed that I do comedy. I always did comedy.

— Sigourney Weaver

When there's no girls around, there's humor.

— Joe Gatto

“What a lot of funny people it does take to make a world.”

— Agatha Christie

Humor is the best means of surviving in a difficult world.

— Ogden Nash

A lollipop is a cross between hard candy and garbage.

— Mitch Hedberg

“I'm sorry I missed the meeting and hurt your little feely-weels okay?”

— Nenia Campbell

I live in Los Angeles, I know it exists. I know you're not supposed to taste air.

— Marc Maron

“trying to restore some kind of natural balance of humors in the world.”

— Kate Atkinson

All my relatives and friends have been pretty aware of my brand of humor for a while, so none of them have…

— Nikki Glaser

Ann and I will carry out this equivocal message to the world: Markets must be open.

— George W. Bush

Life is not a tragedy, it is a comedy. To be alive means to have a sense of humor.

— Rajneesh

You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.

— Bill Cosby

I was crazy about silent comedy - in the old days, and crazy about Japanese movies.

— Keith Johnstone

“I had this dream about you. We went hunting up in the mountains and I caught a unicorn. You told me now…

— Crystal Hudson

“I am so sorry to hear of Asher 's passing. I will miss his scientific insight and advice, but even more his…

— Charles Henry Bennett

“Well, where's the hussy now? Is she in Avalon? Does she live in New York? Is she allergic to strawberries? Because I…

— Chelsea Fine

“They could hear people complaining; one surly voice said, "I can't see no gas..." "That's because it's colorless," said Ginny in a…

— J.K. Rowling

“At the Temple of the Seven-Handed Sek a hasty convocation of priests and ritual heart-transplant artisans agreed that the hundred-span-high statue of…

— Terry Pratchett

With humor you have so many options with topics and length, I mean I can write humor essays in books now and…

— Dave Barry

I love playing her Southern-ness. That's a really important aspect of the character, and to me, she's sort of an amalgam of…

— Connie Britton

“My number one fear is heights. Well, not so much the heights but the falling from heights. Actually the falling isn’t that…

— John Zakour

“There's a reason why your toes are forward and your heels backward. It means, step on your past with your heels and…

— Nomthandazo Tsembeni

“A contented sigh came from the tips of her toes.”

— Linda L. Broday

I like bawdy humor. I love bawdy humor, but not dirty humor.

— Betty White

Small earthquake in Chile. Not many dead.

— Claud Cockburn

“My name might be similar, but I'd never say 'Laters, baby.”

— Jennifer Probst

“I think I might have blushed. Damn me. -Daemon”

— Jennifer L. Armentrout

I see light at the end of the tunnel.

— Walt Whitman Rostow

“What in the name of Voldy’s pasty-white rear end was that?”

— G. Norman Lippert

Top Ten List: Why Elvis Will Replace Jesus (a classic Net humor piece).

— Anonymous

The pug is living proof that God has a sense of humor.

— Margo Kaufman

“How to make God laugh. Tell him your future plans.”

— Woody Allen

I want to see a ton more comedy for women.

— Casey Wilson

“It's enough to be benign, to be gentle, to be funny, to be kind.”

— Stephen Fry

For doing comedy, a sense of humor is a must!

— Deepika Padukone

Guns don't kill people. Dads with pretty daughters kill people. . .

— Rick Sutter

“It’s a tricky business, nurturing that aura of unapproachability.”

— Dean Hale

I was always rewarded for being funny. I liked being funny.

— Iliza Shlesinger