Having diarrhea at work is the true definition of a shitty day. — Nikhil Saluja Diarrhea Copy Share Image
WIFE, A female who would rather mend your ways than your socks; — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
A Woman Never Say: This porno scene is boring, fast forward to the gang bang. — Nikhil Saluja Boring Copy Share Image
You guys, some things are worth dying for like family and unprotected left turns. — Nikhil Saluja Death Copy Share Image
They say that you make a first impression after the first 7 seconds. To avoid this, I always show up 7 seconds late. — Nikhil Saluja First impression Copy Share Image
You should never ever be nice with people, they'll take advantage of you & then fuck you. — Nikhil Saluja Advantage Copy Share Image
Always listen to both sides of the story. Its usually the ones you believed, who turn out to be the biggest liars. — Nikhil Saluja Liars Copy Share Image
No, is it like Facebook? - me, whenever someone asks if I have a Twitter account — Nikhil Saluja Asks Copy Share Image
I've been staring at my Smart Phone for so long, I'm pretty sure it just told me to get a fucking life. — Nikhil Saluja Life Copy Share Image
Women. Can't live with them, can't finish this joke without having sex with them & then later sleep on couch. — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
Every day I find out if I'm getting too fat by checking if I can lick my own nipples. Looks like I'm… — Nikhil Saluja Every day Copy Share Image
Throughout my life, I've lived, I've loved, I've lost, I've missed, I've hurt, I've trusted, I've made mistakes. Most of all I've… — Nikhil Saluja Failure Copy Share Image
I just got engaged. My fiancée won't take my name because Lisa Levin sounds awful. So she's just going to remain Lisa… — Nikhil Saluja Facebook Copy Share Image
I stick my middle finger up at the cops all the time. At night. When they're driving the opposite way. And we're… — Nikhil Saluja Cops Copy Share Image
If shes amazing, she wont be easy. If shes easy, she wont be amazing. If shes worth it, you wont give up.… — Nikhil Saluja Amazing Copy Share Image
Give a man a fish and you'll feed him for a day, but give a man an empty house and a hand… — Nikhil Saluja Fish Copy Share Image
The problem with being just friends is I have to watch you be with someone who doesn't deserve you when I could… — Nikhil Saluja Friendship Copy Share Image
I don't need beer to have a good time, I just need it to focus, avoid depression, good tweets, fall asleep, and… — Nikhil Saluja Beer Copy Share Image
