Funny facebook status Quotes by Nikhil Saluja

Moving on is really hard !

— Nikhil Saluja

Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

— Nikhil Saluja

Girls try. Women succeed.

— Nikhil Saluja

I feel like I understand you.

— Nikhil Saluja

Life: One word is enough.

— Nikhil Saluja

Save me, Jeebus!

— Nikhil Saluja

Had a near-life experience.

— Nikhil Saluja

Zoro is Batman of Mexico.

— Nikhil Saluja

The bandage was wound around the wound.

— Nikhil Saluja

If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed.

— Nikhil Saluja

I started out with nothing...and I still have most of it left.

— Nikhil Saluja

HUSBAND, SMART, A man who is on listening terms with his wife

— Nikhil Saluja

Vice: Anything you enjoy that is bad for you

— Nikhil Saluja

LOVE, Is like war -- simple to begin but the devil to stop;

— Nikhil Saluja

I really want to send some food to Hungary.

— Nikhil Saluja

Woman say:YOU NEVER LISTEN. Woman means:You never listen.

— Nikhil Saluja

I drove my expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.

— Nikhil Saluja

Wives are funny creatures. They don't have sex with their husbands for weeks and then they want to kill the woman who…

— Nikhil Saluja

Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.

— Nikhil Saluja

My mind is now so crowded with valuable information that I can't think.

— Nikhil Saluja

I named my first born child after my mother-in-law. In fact, lazy fat ass bitch turns 5 tomorrow.

— Nikhil Saluja

If a girl bangs 10 guys in a year, shes a slut. But if a guy does it¦ hes gay. Definately gay.

— Nikhil Saluja

Woman can take unpredictable to a whole new level of psycho if you test them...

— Nikhil Saluja

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada: Self-preserving, but open to meeting new people.

— Nikhil Saluja

Here's my idea for another one of those reality-based TV shows: No Survivors! One by one, a psychopathic serial killer tracks down…

— Nikhil Saluja

If you say you're in a bad place, and everything is coming your way, then chances are you're a woman, and you're…

— Nikhil Saluja

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you make my fav cake for me, and I learned that the little things…

— Nikhil Saluja

If a guy tells you he's not ready for a relationship, it's ok to give him time. Just not any of yours...he's…

— Nikhil Saluja

Oh no! What have I done? I smashed open my little boy's piggy bank, and for what? A few measly cents, not…

— Nikhil Saluja

When friends at work ask me to hang out I tell them I'm busy at home and friends at home that I'm…

— Nikhil Saluja

When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you give of your time and money to help people who had nothing, and…

— Nikhil Saluja

You know why the US can't find Osama Bin Laden? They're using the wrong agency to look for him. Don't send the…

— Nikhil Saluja

A couple is married for 47 years and the woman dies. At the funeral, the pallbearers swing the coffin, which hits a…

— Nikhil Saluja

How could you? Haven't you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain What's His Name? We live…

— Nikhil Saluja

After miraculously surviving two heart surgeries, pneumonia and a mild stroke, at 82 my grandfather was no longer able to care for…

— Nikhil Saluja

I was eating an orange the other day and a friend said, Did you know nothing rhymes with 'orange?' So, I threw…

— Nikhil Saluja

Alex Rodriguez never gets clutch hits in October, yet his fans insist on comparing him to Babe Ruth. So A-Rod tries to…

— Nikhil Saluja

They say gay people have gaydar, which lets them figure out who else is gay. Waiters in expensive restaurants have something similar,…

— Nikhil Saluja

Sukc my dikc, aoutocrrtc.

— Nikhil Saluja

You are the love of my twitter

— Nikhil Saluja