“Do you think he's the murderer?" "It's worse than that -- he's an actor!” — Julian Fellowes Copy Share Image
I know David Walliams did 'Blankety Blank', and when he did that I was so jealous. I would have loved to have… — Alan Carr Copy Share Image
“Maverick texted her throughout the day making sure she was okay, and who knew that the word fuck could sound so sweet?… — Laura Kaye Copy Share Image
“I've given her signs! I've given her plenty of signs. What does she want me to do? Slap him across the face… — Molly Ringle Copy Share Image
“You better hope she doesn't say a word," Gabe warned, lifting a finger to Uri's nose. Uri grabbed the finger laughing, "What… — Wendy Owens Copy Share Image
“You lying lunatic bastard. They're going to kill you." "I love you too," he murmured. "Go find Seph.” — Cinda Williams Chima Copy Share Image
“But most of all I feel my brain, up there taking in blood and looking out on the world and noticing humor… — Ned Vizzini Copy Share Image
No funny stuff in here tonight, you understand?” Dash said, “I assure you I could not contemplate any of your so-called funny… — David Levithan Copy Share Image
Comedy is like math - you can check your answer because you know you've gotten it right if you get a laugh.… — Jennifer Carpenter Copy Share Image
“Simplicity may be simple, but like complexity it requires linguistic precision, and may therefore call for relatively obscure expressions at times.” — John White Copy Share Image
“If Arkansas is, indeed, one big family, Eureka Springs remains its eccentric uncle.” — Rex Nelson Copy Share Image
“The answer to enemies who heal annoyingly fast is always, always decapitation. That is why swords will never go out of style.” — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“Stumbling out of the debris cloud, I ran smack into Jules. "What the hell did ya do?" she asked in exasperation. "I… — B. Justin Shier Copy Share Image
“I'm not going to do that." "of course you're not." Jace said. "because you live to torture me, don't you?" "Not everything,… — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
“I had concocted the gunpowder myself from niter, sulfur, charcoal, and a happy heart. When working with explosives, I've found that attitude… — Alan Bradley Copy Share Image
“dark light. [Not actually an oxymoron. It's the color past ultra-violet. The technical term for it is infrablack. It can be seen… — Neil Gaiman Copy Share Image
A woman is a woman. A woman has male problems, has job problems, and I think funny is funny. — Kym Whitley Copy Share Image
“The entity should attempt, - seriously, prayerfully, spiritually, - to see even that as might be called the ridiculous side of every… — Edgar Cayce Copy Share Image
Laughter is the best medicine, daily dose of laughter keeps you active, your mind fresh and most of all makes you happy. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Seeing the energy of 'SNL' made me want to be a part of it. If that was a job, I thought, that… — Olivia Wilde Copy Share Image
The reason you often get in comedy is because you're not getting laid. — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
I don't mind when my horse is left at the post. I don't mind when my horse comes up to me in… — Henny Youngman Copy Share Image
When I was at the interview asked how I cope with life's difficulties, I said that saving sense of humor. I'm not… — Eva Longoria Copy Share Image
Where comedy works best is where it does something unexpected and seeks to shed a different light on something which you haven't… — Rebecca Root Copy Share Image
“Genna: “My straw has a hole in it!” Tim: *gives her a Really? look* Genna: “One that it’s not meant to have!” — Timmothy Radman Copy Share Image
“I hadn't known this about love: that you did not need to deserve it. I thought there was a set of criteria,… — Max Barry Copy Share Image
Barack Obama may be black, but John McCain is the first Albino presidential candidate: he's completely see-through! — George Lopez Copy Share Image
“Remember! Reality's an illusion, the universe is a hologram, buy gold! Byeeee!” — Bill Cipher Gravity Falls tv show Copy Share Image
“I just... I understand you might want to start dating more seriously, and that means dating someone from town. But if you're… — Kelley Armstrong Copy Share Image
