“That’s the key, you know, confidence. I know for a fact that if you genuinely like your body, so can others. It… — Dawn French Copy Share Image
Birdy birdy in the sky Dropped a poopy in my eyes, I do not worry I do not cry I am just… — Shubham Pal Copy Share Image
I was in a hotel room in Dallas, and I was jerking off so much and so sadly and pathetically, that the… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
Messy females talk noise, stupid hoes chase boys, ignorant tricks follow dick and bad bitches get rich. Good girls are made of… — Diamond Makayla Copy Share Image
“Most sane human beings who are over the age of six usually act or react not as per what they genuinely feel… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
Glenn was the one who invited me to join the Eagles in 1974, and it turned out to be a gift of… — Don Felder Copy Share Image
I guess the more serious you play something, if the context is funny, then it will be funny and it doesn't really… — Jesse Eisenberg Copy Share Image
I got a wrestling ring downstairs in my basement. We did this thing where we were running the ropes and Billy Gunn… — Darby Allin Copy Share Image
To me, 'X Factor' is like Vegas. Fake, twisted, but kind of wonderful. Maybe I'm sick, but I find the whole thing… — Charli XCX Copy Share Image
“If all of your friends are morons is it a felony, a misdemeanor or an act of God if you blow their… — Bret Easton Ellis Copy Share Image
Her friends say she is very funny. At a family dinner, she stood to go, and the footman very properly pulled her… — Prince Andrew Copy Share Image
“I am not going to give you disclaimers about what you can expect to find in my story. I went through menopause… — BadSquirrel Copy Share Image
“Cat's friends seemed like very sweet girls," Dad says. "They were the bomb," I say fervently, and he looks back at me… — Maya Gold Copy Share Image
Moe's the first character that I played that actually allowed me to embrace all parts of myself, including my physical appearance, the… — Kiana Madeira Copy Share Image
I love Mikhail Bulgakov. He is very original and takes the story to unexpected places. I didn't realise political writing could be… — Denise Mina Copy Share Image
When it comes to racism, you hear people say, "I don't care if people are white, black, purple or green." Hold on,… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
This Columbus Day, let's apologize for our historical mistreatment of American Indians by losing money at a tribal casino. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
'Sort of' is such a harmless thing to say... sort of. It's just a filler. Sort of... it doesn't really mean anything.… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
I had a terrible time hiring rich people. It sounds funny, but the problem is when things go wrong they can ask,… — Ben Horowitz Copy Share Image
That would be cool if you could eat a good food with a bad food and the good food would cover for… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
[On the Dating Handbook] 'With a telescope, some munchies, and a warm blanket, watch for Halley's comet.' Yeah. I like that. There's… — David Cross Copy Share Image
“You won't tell?" "I'll add it to the box under my bed labeled 'The Secret Confession of the Immortal Pia'. Good Lord,… — Jessica Khoury Copy Share Image
Nothing interferes with my concentration. You could put on an orgy in my office and I wouldn't look up. Well, maybe once.. — Isaac Asimov Copy Share Image
I don't look at my work as being violent. 'Officer Downe' is more campy than anything. It's a comic book, so it's… — Shawn Crahan Copy Share Image
One time a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign. He said, "Didn't you see the stop sign?" I said,… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
Le coeur d'une me' re est un ab|"me au fond duquel se trouve toujours un pardon. A mother'sheart isanabyss atthebottomof whichthere is… — Honore de Balzac Copy Share Image
So why dont you start studying her heart and stop studying her booty, or maybe invest the same amount of time on… — Ana Copy Share Image
I'm not someone who shies away from darkness being funny. I think that life is very dark at times, and there are… — Brett Gelman Copy Share Image
“What the hell happened to your leg?" Ang asked him. Matt looked down at his shin, which was scraped and oozing and… — Marie Sexton Copy Share Image
Pardon me but I was just about to go home and masturbate and I was wondering if you'd mind if I fantasize… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
“This is where you all live?" Asked John as they ascended the stairs. "It's small." "This is just our Thanksgiving house," Scott… — Adam Rex Copy Share Image
The awkward moment when you put something in a safe place so you don't lose it and then forget where that safe… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Your relationship or marriage is dead or dying, if you almost always have to remind your partner to miss you (and/or they… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“It's funny. I thought she'd live through anything." Charlie said, "Me too. I figured even if there was a nuclear war, it… — Neil Gaiman Copy Share Image
I looked on my stomach and saw Frieda Rebecca, white as flour with the cream that covers new babies, funny little dark… — Sylvia Plath Copy Share Image
There is no such thing as Intelligence; one has intelligence of this or that. One must have intelligence only for what one… — Edgar Degas Copy Share Image
“I' before 'E' except after 'C', and when sounded like 'ay' as in neighbor and weigh, and on weekends and holidays, and… — Brian Regan Copy Share Image
I think Irish women are strong as horses, incredibly loyal and for the most part, funny, witty, bright and optimistic in the… — Fionnula Flanagan Copy Share Image
I miss you when I'm not with you. When I'm not with you all I do is think about you. When I… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Nothing better than a reality show where everyone's speaking English yet they still need subtitles to be understood. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
![“[On the Dating Handbook] 'With a telescope, some munchies, and a warm blanket, watch for Halley's comet.' Yeah. I like that. There's no time limit. Just sit there and grow old together.” quote by David Cross](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/bf1/david-cross-3386_blanket_on-the-dating-handbook-with-a-telescope_3033428.jpg)
