Politicians can do more funny things naturally than I can think of to do purposely — Will Rogers Copy Share Image
“Ma didn't think puns were funny but couldn't help laughing at the naughty look Pa gave her when he made one.” — Laura Ingalls Wilder Copy Share Image
“I did not ask for your help.' 'But you have it nonetheless.” — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
Learn everything you possibly can, and you will discover later that none of it was superfluous. — Hugh of Saint Victor Copy Share Image
TheBiggestLies Classmate: Do you have any gum? ; Me: Nah man, I got it from someone else. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“I've got a cab waiting so we sh-" he stopped speaking as he entered the sitting room, his eyes frozen on me.… — Samantha Young Copy Share Image
“He swallowed, and his voice was a bit rough, but he was "You know, I think moving is key to this whole… — K.A. Mitchell Copy Share Image
Underground, raw movies that come out of nowhere and change everything - they aren't slick-looking. But I have nothing against slick-looking as… — John Waters Copy Share Image
If I had a dollar for everytime someone over 40 told me my generation sucks, then I could afford a house in… — John Vercetti Copy Share Image
If I were to die of anything vaguely sex-related or had taken Viagra, you just know there'd be headlines of 'Russell How-hard'… — Russell Howard Copy Share Image
“I glance down his body. He's still wearing his shorts and his shirt, and I still have my T-shirt on. Jeez-- talk… — E.L. James Copy Share Image
The seminary of depths of pain has taught us this, What is the value of a human being and what constitutes humanity?… — Mohd Aariff Khan Copy Share Image
When I was a kid I had an imaginary friend and I used to think that he went everywhere with me, and… — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
Nearness to God brings likeness to God. The more you see God the more of God will be seen in you. — Charles Spurgeon Copy Share Image
People often ask what I think of Michael McIntyre. I think he's funny. He's a nice bloke. — Peter Kay Copy Share Image
Everybody who belongs to Christ belongs to everybody who belongs to Christ — E. Stanley Jones Copy Share Image
I didn't set out to write some female-empowering movie; I just wanted to write a funny college comedy. — Kay Cannon Copy Share Image
Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there. — Josh Billings Copy Share Image
HUSBAND, A man who has one mistake in his existence -- and keeps learning from it all his life; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made. — Jean Giraudoux Copy Share Image
Goth Juice... The most powerful hairspray known to man. Made from the tears of Robert Smith. — Noel Fielding Copy Share Image
Happy Boss's Day to the person whose job I never, ever, ever, ever want. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“If Duncan was ever into men then he's been so far in the closet he's been living in Narnia.” — Dana Marie Bell Copy Share Image
The more studying you did for the exam, the less sure you are as to which answer they want. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I can't stand Liverpool. I can't stand the people. I can't stand anything to do with them. — Gary Neville Copy Share Image
Monday mornings would be better if they were a part of my weekend-long blackouts. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If women think all men are the same, then why do they worry so much about picking the right one :P — Ritu Copy Share Image
Where's Kanye West when my parents are giving me a 9376969675949 hour lecture? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
