Some of the best fiction writers got their start writing airline menus. — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
Farrah's dressing room was next to mine. There was a little hole in the wall. I let her look. — Henny Youngman Copy Share Image
Ladies, Don't worry - if you haven't found the man of your dreams yet, there's always a vibrator. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
HUSBAND, HENPECKED, A man who always consults his better half instead of his better judgement; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The resistance is not something to be avoided, it's something to seek out. — Seth Godin Copy Share Image
The Giver of life gave it for happiness and not for wretchedness. — Thomas Jefferson Copy Share Image
They've gotta stop reporting wind chill. That's nonsense. It really is. I don't know where they came up with it, why they… — Lewis Black Copy Share Image
I have an oven with a 'stop time' button. It's probably meant to be 'stop timer' but I don't touch it, just… — Ritu Ghatourey Copy Share Image
My rule is: If you meet the weakest vessel, attack. If it is a vessel equal to yours, attack. And if it… — Stepan Makarov Copy Share Image
If you have a character that doesn't have anything wrong with him, there's nothing funny about it. The idea of the straight… — Will Arnett Copy Share Image
There's something dangerous about what's funny. Jarring and disconcerting. There is a connection between funny and scary. — Christopher Walken Copy Share Image
*Engineesing student* Question: Why AMBULANCE is WHITE in color ?? (15 marks) . . Ans: AMBULANCE has OXYGEN cylinder, . Oxygen is… — Melchor Lim Copy Share Image
“Nero, we need to talk. Chloe will not get off my ass. I told her,” Amo looked right at Chloe in the… — Sarah Brianne Copy Share Image
Writing this book required an enormous amount of help from friends. To them goes the credit. I'll take the money. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
These are just things that we don't know, and that's where trust and faith come in. — Benjamin Carson Copy Share Image
Americans spend 6 billion hours a year filling out their tax reforms. — George W. Bush Copy Share Image
Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is understanding the other person is a complete idiot. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Unless we take action on climate change, future generations will be roasted, toasted, fried and grilled. — Christine Lagarde Copy Share Image
My name is Steven Crowder, and I happen to find blatant gayness funny. I mean really funny. — Steven Crowder Copy Share Image
INTELLIGENCE is like underwear...It is important that you have it but not necessary that you show it off. — Nate Copy Share Image
If beating ourselves up worked, we would all be thin, rich, and happy, wouldn't we? — Cheryl Richardson Copy Share Image
My condolences on all the small talk you must endure because of your desk's proximity to the elevator. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Opening a test paper and seeing the first question and thinking ...Yup, I'm screwed — Anonymous Copy Share Image
We should rather examine, who is better learned, than who is more learned. — Michel de Montaigne Copy Share Image
You have to do more than you get paid for because that’s where the fortune is. — Jim Rohn Copy Share Image
My parents say it's their house but when it's time to clean it magically becomes my house too - — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Although I tried to be universal in thought, I am European by instinct and inclination. — Albert Einstein Copy Share Image
