“Some people say, "I only want to do God's work." How do you know what God's work is??” — Art Hochberg Copy Share Image
We call ourselves comedy writer-performers, and that encompasses everything, and I certainly have a very open mind about it. — Robert Webb Copy Share Image
My wife, my daughters, even my grandchildren are funny. You've got to keep a sense of humor because anger destroys you. — Michael Caine Copy Share Image
April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four.. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“Decker smiled and shrugged off their laughter. The humour was only barbed if you sat on the outside, and now he was… — R.D. Ronald Copy Share Image
“Next morning while imbibing his morning tea beneath his pink silken quilt Bernard decided he must marry Ethel with no more delay.” — Daisy Ashford Copy Share Image
“THINGS YOU NEVER HEAR: 'Please stop sucking my dick or I'll call the police.” — George Carlin Copy Share Image
A lot of celebrities have a sense of humor, and combined with an outrageous event, sometimes the sky's the limit! — Chris March Copy Share Image
A molehill man is a pseudo-busy executive who comes to work at 9 AM and finds a molehill on his desk. He… — Fred Allen Copy Share Image
Freud wrote a book on the essence of humor, but he didn't know what he was talking about. Max Eastman wrote a… — John Gould Copy Share Image
A lot of political people, especially people on the left, have forgotten the importance of humor as an incredible weapon, and a… — Michael Moore Copy Share Image
“I'm going to have a hard time sending you off with Scott in that dress. Just a heads-up: If you come home… — Becca Fitzpatrick Copy Share Image
I like a guy who can make fun of me and make fun of himself. He's got to have a sense of… — Rachel Bilson Copy Share Image
“Smitty leaned forward, resting his arms on this raised knees. "I am fixin' to get mad, Jessie. "You're fixin' to get mad?"… — Shelly Laurenston Copy Share Image
I'm lucky that I get to jump around, do a big-budget comedy and then a smaller film. I don't even make a… — Richard Linklater Copy Share Image
Whenever I meet someone who doesn't seem to have much of a sense of humor I like to lighten things up by… — Rock Cowles Copy Share Image
I'm too far to the left for some, too far to the right for others. I'm my own brand of comedy. — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
“It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the blame” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
I'm not a comedian. I don't make things funny if they're not funny. I don't invent funny stuff. — Morgan Freeman Copy Share Image
I think comedy as an art involves the audience as a participant as much as is involves the artist. — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
“Don't take candy from strangers. The people you know are strange enough.” — Kim Faulkner Copy Share Image
You can't get all of your news from Jon Stewart, especially since it's a comedy show. — Joe Klein Copy Share Image
“Enough, gentlemen, enough! Show a New World marsupial a little respect” — Sara Pascoe Copy Share Image
There's no possibility of being witty without a little ill-nature - the malice of a good thing is the barb that makes… — Richard Brinsley Sheridan Copy Share Image
“Jo's nineteen hair-pins all seemed stuck straight into her head, which was not exactly comfortable; but, dear me, let us be elegant… — Louisa May Alcott Copy Share Image
“Decided to put aside ethnic differences in the cause of making more money.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Just because i have a fedora on doesn't mean i want to help solve crime, but it also doesn't mean that i… — Kiersten Zeitler Copy Share Image
“Women are really strange, if you think about it. But this was no ordinary woman. This was a succubus—a life sucking monster.” — Justin Villanueva Copy Share Image
“You know the look: genius gone to pot, and ready to join the Communist Party” — William Saroyan Copy Share Image
If Pete Rose brings the Reds in first, they ought to bronze him and put him in cement. — Jerry Coleman Copy Share Image
“twenty-three hours of nonstop traveling over two continents and countless time zones, her sense of humor” — Leeanna Morgan Copy Share Image
One of the real ways out of conflict is humour. It builds bridges; it's a weapon against rigid ideology, narrow thinking, intolerance. — Anthony McCarten Copy Share Image
“I like the smell of my Grandma's soap - I used to sit in the bath and eat it.” — Carl Barât Copy Share Image
If I'm the president, we're going to have emergency-room care, we're going to have gag orders. — George W. Bush Copy Share Image
There is nothing so debilitating to a naturally weak sense of humor as selling tickets behind a grating. — Kate Douglas Wiggin Copy Share Image
“If God could make a carpenter into a Savior, a slave trader into a reverend, why not an opium addict into an… — Michelle Griep Copy Share Image
“Spreading laughter is healthy and more fun than sex. Well... unless you do them at the same time.” — Michael Clutton Copy Share Image
I didn't go to college, but if I did, I would've taken all my tests at a restaurant, 'cause 'The customer is… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
“He wanted one drink, and understood precisely why he wasn't going to have one. One drink ended up arriving in a dozen… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
Sex is pretty funny, let's face it. And the more seriously we take ourselves, the funnier sex gets, I think. — Betty White Copy Share Image
