Humor Quotes · Page 180

“Nothing of importance happened today.”

— Anonymous

“Sticks and stones may break your bones but words can break hearts.”

— Tim Minchin

I met Steve Jobs once. In '06? He had a sense of humor.

— Fred Armisen

“You were chastising me. You may continue.”

— C.L. Wilson

I am romantic, witty, naughty... and I show that in my acting.

— Dharmendra

But you shall not escape my iambics.

— Catullus

God is a comedian, playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.

— Anonymous

“Life is, enlightenment once again postponded.”

— Saroj Aryal

I've always been a figure skater and ballet dancer. I love physical comedy, and any chance that I get to do that...…

— Allison Janney

After God created the world, He made man and woman. Then, to keep the whole thing from collapsing, He invented humor.

— Anonymous

“What women want is still what it's always been: either you or, more likely, not you.”

— David Mitchell

“If we want less and less, we may in fact receive more and more of what we need. It may work like…

— Art Hochberg

“If the second date seems to be going well, it's pretty much a given that by dessert I'll renounce my faith”

— Josh Stern

I actually pay careful attention to that sort of thing - infusing humor into my films - because that's how important I…

— Park Chan-wook

My career is chequered. Then I think I got pigeon-holed in humour; Shakespeare is not my thing.

— Maggie Smith

“...What do people think about my staying with Harrison with him chasing everything that's hot and hollow?”

— Dashiell Hammett

I'd love to be in a feature film, and I don't just mean in a starring role - it could be a…

— Barbara Mandrell

My uncles were all funny. My dad wasn't funny, but my uncles were all funny. Now I go back and I like…

— Louis C. K

The biggest influence on my writing, besides snagging some ideas about black humor, was that the paper mill had a program where…

— Donald Ray Pollock

You get used to such micro-aggressions, those sneaky remarks. Especially in comedy: when the mood is meant to be light you can…

— Rose Matafeo

“The twelve jurors were all writing very busily on the slates. "What are they doing?" Alice whispered to the Gryphon. "They can't…

— Lewis Carroll

“This nation is like all the others that have been spewed upon the earth--ready to shout for any cause that will tickle…

— Mark Twain

My comedy has no color, it's for everybody, black, white, Latino, Asian. It's not a pro-black show, not a def jam show;…

— Bruce Bruce

“Finally, I found what seemed at the time to be a lid of some sort. Presuming it was a toilet seat (but…

— Dave Mustaine

Get a sense of humor. If you don't, it'll be incredibly frustrating.

— Jon Stewart

The best humor is offered up by the stupidity of your opponents.

— Barney Frank

“Let's see if your right foot is as fearless as your mouth.”

— Doug Solter

I started doing comedy because it was an escape for me.

— Patti Harrison

“I hope you are pleased with yourself. You have made a spirit cry.”

— Katie MacAlister

“Beauty may catch the eye, but a jolly laugh will lasso the heart.”

— Richelle E. Goodrich

With Irish drama, things are told with humor.

— Rory O'Malley

“A Sorcery community? Do they have a Facebook page?”

— Leia Shaw

I don't care if I'm funny. I just want people to believe I'm that guy.

— Jim Piddock

What holds you back in comedy is fear.

— Sinbad

“No one goes with Pigs where Muslims reside and is welcome by anyone”

— Fredrick Oginga

What is pornography to one man is the laughter of genius to another.

— Anonymous

Though laughter is allowable, a horse-laugh is abominable.

— Marcus Tullius Cicero

I never considered myself a funny person.

— Tricky

I love comedy, but it's dramas that stick with me.

— Bill Hader

“A domesticated man makes my lady parts beep!”

— Comic Strip Mama