Quote by Jarod Kintz Download Open image ““I’ll wear a fork on my head, and if anybody wants a job, they can eat salad off my scalp.”” — Jarod Kintz ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 3.3 out of 5 (7 ratings) Copy quoteShare
“I am forever engaged in a silent battle in my head over whether or not to lift the fork to my mouth...” — Jena Morrow Copy Share Image
“How anyone can be that dumb and still be able to eat with a fork is beyond me.” — KD McCrite Copy Share Image
“There’s a hair in my soup. That’s the problem of using my helmet as a bowl.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Whenever you come upon a fork in the road DON'T put it in your mouth! You don't know where it's been.” — G. R. Paskoff Copy Share Image
“It is easy to forget that a fork is simply a knife with several blades.” — James L. Richardson Copy Share Image
“Did you tell that prospect over there that ‘not a hair’ on my head was to be touched?” “I think I said, ‘not a… — Lauren Gilley Copy Share Image
“I notice when you’re gone. Or do I? How can I observe something that isn’t there?” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A blanket could be used to make sweet, sweet music with the love of your life. Hopefully that person is me, because I’ve been… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A brick could be used to slow down time. Sort of like a camel in a wheelchair pushed by a thirsty Arab. Hey, Khalid,… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“We have a love so pure that it makes snow seem yellow. (Don’t eat it!)” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I hid Mrs. Frozenwater’s body in the ice cube trays in my freezer. Better to keep her there than let her memory thaw out… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Two similar words might lead to two similar ideas. They might also lead to the basement, which I recently converted into a dungeon/torture chamber.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Nothing is and isn’t; nothing is and isn’t—nothing itself is, and at the same time, nothing isn’t.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“There’s only one piece of clothing I could eat fast, and that’s a scarf.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Dora J. Arod is to Jarod Ora, as yes is to yes. Yes is also the correct answer to “Will you marry me?” Other… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The best part about being kidnapped is being blindfolded and getting kicked into the trunk of a car. Boy, normally I have to beg… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
