Comedy Quote by Chelsea Handler Download Open image “We usually have margaritas on Thursdays but since it's Tuesday I'll make an exception.” — Chelsea Handler ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 2.1 out of 5 (6 ratings) Copy quoteShare Comedy Exception Funny Humor Margarita Thursday Tuesday
I love to go out with my husband and a few friends on Friday or Saturday. Being from Southern California, Mexican food is my… — Denise Austin Copy Share Image
If I'm in a good mood and just want to enjoy my night, I'll go for a margarita. — Aryna Sabalenka Copy Share Image
It's almost hump day which is close to Thursday which is close to Friday so it's okay for me to drink today...as if I… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Summer Drinking Rule number 3: Margaritas count as your daily serving of fruit. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I really like a margarita, but I feel like you don't always want something that extra. — Heidi Gardner Copy Share Image
They should make a beer called Mondays. That would be a case of the Mondays I wouldn't mind having. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I was a weekend drinker...I'd start on Saturday, end on Friday...thought I was controlling it...but I don't drink any more. — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
I'm hoping that Thursday happy hour, doesn't become Friday sad morning hangover. Happy Friday. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I think the people I talk about are generally so stupid that they don't even know I'm saying bad things about them. I've run… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
At some point during almost every romantic comedy, the female lead suddenly trips and falls, stumbling helplessly over something ridiculous like a leaf, and… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
A federal grand jury is investigating allegations that David Copperfield raped, assaulted and threatened a woman he took to his private island in the… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
It's been my experience that people who make proclamations about themselves are usually the opposite of what they claim to be. If someone is… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
“My mother agreed to aid my abuse of alcohol but only if I promised never to tell my newly converted Mormon sister, whose identity… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
I try to not overthink anything. I don't understand why nipples are nudity. Who cares? Men can show their nipples but if we have… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
Seeing your mother naked is not something you easily recover from. Seeing your mother naked and jumping from one side of a king-sized bed… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
I don't like the word 'alcoholic'. I like to think of myself as an advanced drinker. — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
I can remember my first one-night stand like it was yesterday. Well, maybe not the first. Or the second¦ or the fifth. Ill just… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
“It was quite obvious that without severe behavior modification, this boy would grow up to be a serial killer.” — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
Why he would agree to install an eight-by-eight-foot fish tank and then not fill it with a single dolphin made me want to burn… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
'Mad TV' is one of my most favorite shows of all time and is a huge part of my obsession with sketch comedy. — Shane Dawson Copy Share Image
In the future, I would like to do more films with contemporary themes. Perhaps comedy, which is something I have done in theater but… — Luke Evans Copy Share Image
“Men circle like bees around honey, buzzing to communicate their sexual despair.” — Carla H Krueger Copy Share Image
You can't cheat comedy. You know, it either is going to be there on the day you capture or it's not. — Justin Lin Copy Share Image
I think if I have any kind of unique gift, it's more in the comedy area than it is in the dramatic area. — Susan Sullivan Copy Share Image
I always worked on holidays when I had to wait tables and stuff like that, so I'm used to it, but now I just… — Chris Redd Copy Share Image
There's nothing like the energy in a small comedy club room or a small theater when it's going really well. I can see everybody's… — Drew Carey Copy Share Image
God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny. — Garrison Keillor Copy Share Image
