In sitcoms, the women are so beautiful, understanding and well-bred. They have humor, but sort of display it with a twinkle of… — Bea Arthur Copy Share Image
“Dear God, she couldn't give this man sex. She could barely give it to Van, and he currently smelled so good she… — Charlotte Stein Copy Share Image
“How does one address... the master of the vampire executioners? My lord? Your grace? Your stakeness?” — Colleen Gleason Copy Share Image
Comedy is getting more diverse - you can do anything on a stage now. It doesn't have to be just one man… — Alex Horne Copy Share Image
Plus, I love comic writing. Nothing satisfies me more than finding a funny way to phrase something. — Michael Pollan Copy Share Image
“Repeated critic sounds like music classic. I prefer Mozard or Bethoven” — Wuwun Wiati Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when someone tells a funny strory but nobody laughs and then they say it was a — KiDD Heartbreak Copy Share Image
When you're a funny person,Most people don't know how to take you seriously. — Abhishek Tiwari Copy Share Image
“The second time, I had a freakin’ vampire at my back.” I froze. Oh shit. “No offense, Mr. Moreau,” I quickly added.… — Lisa Shearin Copy Share Image
I think the thrust of any child is to try to fit in and be part of it. And I can't tell… — Howie Mandel Copy Share Image
The reason I'm not an alcoholic is I don't like to drink in front of the kids . . . and when… — Phyllis Diller Copy Share Image
When people make their usernames be like a cruse word , calling themself sexy ,and what not you gotta wonder what are… — MrCountry Copy Share Image
To go from working with a group of people in a sketch-comedy show on a small network, where it was all about… — Ken Marino Copy Share Image
I am a grown man who is an entertainer with a specific type of humour and if you don't like it, that's… — Bianca Del Rio Copy Share Image
“There’s no experience quite like cutting your own live Christmas tree out of your neighbor’s yard.” — Dan Florence Copy Share Image
In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a… — Robert Orben Copy Share Image
Yes, I've been down the pike and back. And through the years, I've heard different songs with scatting in it, and it… — J. J. Cale Copy Share Image
“Cellaholics are those who interrupt quality time when they are with you, but rather text, call, and email others who are somewhere… — Jayce O'Neal Copy Share Image
“There was no way to have a civilized conversation with that guy. It's like he was raised by giraffes or something.” — H.M. Ward Copy Share Image
“...Rusty followed. “You should probably pull out your gun. Whatever is in there made enough noise to make me believe it wasn’t… — Robin Alexander Copy Share Image
It's interesting because with a lot of people who I've met in comedy, it seems not to matter what your background is.… — Ellie Kemper Copy Share Image
I'd done comedy for years, it was almost like breathing so doing something new is dead exciting. — James Buckley Copy Share Image
The problem is that we live in an uptight country. Why don't we just laugh at ourselves? We are funny. Gays are… — Bob Newhart Copy Share Image
“Where did you meet?” he pressed on. I shrugged and considered a little rephrasing. “I was out for a run.” “From who?”… — Dannika Dark Copy Share Image
I think there's something in the fact that it's hard to be good looking and funny. You have to have an oddball… — Chris O'Dowd Copy Share Image
“Charlotte Stokehurst,” Violet Bridgerton announced, “is getting married.” “Today?” Hyacinth queried, taking off her gloves. Her mother gave her a look. “She… — Julia Quinn Copy Share Image
“At the age of fifteen he had bought off a twopenny stall in the market a duo-decimo book of recipes, gossip, and… — Anthony Burgess Copy Share Image
Philosophy is problem-solving. There's a philosophical problem, and then you try to solve it by approaching it from different angles and seeing… — Kumail Nanjiani Copy Share Image
“Offer me?" A shrill note of indignation entered her voice. "Young man, there are three things that make Britain great. The first… — Kate Griffin Copy Share Image
If you look into their [chimpanzees] eyes, you know you're looking into a thinking mind. They teach us that we are not… — Jane Goodall Copy Share Image
You know, theres endorphins in laughter, as there are endorphins in running in the park. — Marlo Thomas Copy Share Image
It's a tremendous feeling walking on to a set with a live audience and making them laugh, but I love drama, and… — Julia Sawalha Copy Share Image
Math and English must of had a relationship. How else did we get Algebra then? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“But when I make a good [taxidermy] mount I feel like I beat God in a small way. As though the Almighty… — Christopher Buehlman Copy Share Image
There is a kind of laughter that sickens the soul. Laughter when it is out of control: when it screams and stamps… — Mervyn Peake Copy Share Image
To me, I've never understood why there is any question about are women as funny as men. — Judd Apatow Copy Share Image
![“If you look into their [chimpanzees] eyes, you know you're looking into a thinking mind. They teach us that we are not the only beings with personalities, minds capable of rational thought, altruism and a sense of humor. That leads to new respect for other animals, respect for the environment and…” quote by Jane Goodall](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/14e/jane-goodall-950_altruism_if-you-look-into-their-chimpanzees-eyes_3215215.jpg)
![“But when I make a good [taxidermy] mount I feel like I beat God in a small way. As though the Almighty said, Let such critter be dead, and I said, 'Fuck You, he can still play the banjo.” quote by Christopher Buehlman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/e04/christopher-buehlman-42158_humor_but-when-i-make-a-good-taxidermy-mount-i_3215752.jpg)
