Humor Quotes · Page 123

I could do comedy, action, or even science fiction.

— KiKi Layne

“Mat snorted. “I don’t want to be any bloody hero.”

— Robert Jordan

I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.

— Steven Wright

A race track is a place where windows clean people.

— Danny Thomas

I love physical comedy. I adore comedy of any kind.

— Marcia Gay Harden

No man can be an agnostic who has a sense of humor.

— E M Forster

“I learned another rule, men don't buy men flowers”

— Dora Okeyo

And it's a long drive down the line to centerfield.

— Jerry Coleman

Being Indian, you won't be surprised to learn that your life is an Open Book!

— Mishan Amithab Kasiparsad

Life is the only race youll run where you dont know where the finish line is.

— Steve Farrar

Anger and humour are like the left and right arm. They complement each other.

— James H. Cone

“. . . I understand that this is the point of laughter, to spread happiness.”

— Gayle Forman

I took a course in speed waiting. Now I can wait an hour in only ten minutes.

— Steven Wright

“Don’t go,” said Cedric. “Murder has made you practically one of the family.”

— Agatha Christie

“Scully was appallingly gregarious—so outgoing she was practically incoming.”

— Karen Joy Fowler

“Crap. No one's ever called me dorkina before. Derivative of dork. Not good.”

— Cynthia Hand

“TIMING TOAST Grook on how to char for yourself There's an art of knowing when. Never try to guess. Toast until it…

— Piet Hein

“And since Logan didn’t seem the least bit antisocial . . . “You don’t have to look like that, you know. I…

— Tessa Adams

I am glad that actors like Akshay Kumar and Salman Khan are doing justice to comedy. But in our days, nobody could…

— Asrani

“Our family was nearly torn apart on several occasions by arguments started when the refrigerator door was open for what my father…

— Weston Locher

Directors, like actors, get typecast. And because I've had great success with comedy and horror and TV shows, that's basically what I'm…

— John Landis

“You have to admit that this is a very strange life. If you don’t admit it, then you have a very high…

— Art Hochberg

“Hey, uh, you know. Um. If you’re alive, uh, call me." I looked at the screen and said, "It's Jane." I closed…

— Faith Hunter

“Maybe you should finally give the girl Pop's number, and I don't know, be her friend." "Just like that." "It's friendship, Harley,…

— Amy Cook

“Never taunt the man with the power to tie you up.”

— Navessa Allen

“Jesus: You picked the wrong Messiah to fuck with!”

— Rick Klaus Theis

“The secret of life lies in laughter and humility.”

— G.K. Chesterton

There's a trench coat and a tragedy in your future.

— Jim Norton

“Plus, humor is a good way to hide the pain. - Leo”

— Rick Riordan

I am a person who recognizes the fallacy of humans.

— George W. Bush

“Birth, n.: The first and direst of all disasters.”

— Ambrose Bierce

“It's hard to win a war with a front at your back.”

— Gregory S. Close

Humor is the affectionate communication of insight.

— Leo Rosten

Laughter is a virus that infects you with humanity.

— Luis Alberto Urrea

I inherited my dad's sense of humor and work ethic.

— Sistine Stallone

“Herve held a sigh and let out a breath of relief.”

— J.S. Mason

I bought a million lottery tickets. I won a dollar.

— Steven Wright

“Dangerously close to having to work for a living.”

— Rosen Topuzov

“Oh, traccy traccy ply ply bracket doints and divs”

— Yahtzee Croshaw

“Dammit Bard, you're going to set the cat on fire.”

— V.E. Schwab