And who are you supposed to be? the King of snot-nosed delinquents? — Michael Buckley Copy Share Image
An Irishman is never drunk as long as he can hold onto one blade of grass to keep from falling off the… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Jim Morrison had star quality and he’s dead. Star quality’s no good to you when you’re dead.” — Neil Walker Copy Share Image
My swimsuit told me to go to the gym. But my sweatpants were like, Nah girl, you're good. — Emaliebaby Copy Share Image
We ought never to scoff at the wretched, for who can be sure of continued happiness? — Jean de La Fontaine Copy Share Image
I work like a retailer. I sell my services, take my money and keep it in the bank. — Shahrukh Khan Copy Share Image
You must be single minded. Drive for the one thing on which you have decided. — George S. Patton Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when your foot falls asleep so you just stomp around like a dinosaur — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Matthias flinched, teeth grinding. "Which one of them told you?" He zeroed in on Ayden. "One?" I said. With a growl, Matthias… — A&E Kirk Copy Share Image
I love 'AP Bio' - I think it's so funny - it's just not the show I want to do. — Adam F. Goldberg Copy Share Image
“Gone are the days when girls used to cook like their mothers and boys used to dress like their fathers. Now girls… — Habeeb Akande Copy Share Image
You cannot experience yourself as what you are until you've encountered what you are not — Neale Donald Walsch Copy Share Image
All the ways you wish you could be, thats me, I look like you wanna look, I fuck like you wanna fuck,… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Marie Antoinette was funny, I'm sure she was just misinterpreted. You know the 'Let them eat cake' line. She seems like she… — Colin Quinn Copy Share Image
“Most human beings would have never been pained by the death of a human being if they had never seen a human… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
I'm a professional comic. Whether you think I'm funny or not, that's, again, subjective. — David Cross Copy Share Image
The truth is, most of us discover where we are headed when we arrive. — Bill Watterson Copy Share Image
2-in-1 is a stupid term, because 1 is not big enough to hold 2. That's why 2 was created. — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
