Funny Quotes · Page 12

“God will break California from the surface of the continent like someone breaking off a piece of chocolate. It will become its…

— Laura Ruby

The difference between a mountain and a molehill is your perspective.

— Al Neuharth

I love Adele. Adele is my favorite artist. She's British. She's funny. She's just an amazing, incredible voice, and I love to…

— Millie Bobby Brown

The funny thing when you are with a man that has lots of fans - particularly female fans - it gets sensitive!

— Diana DeGarmo

It's a bore - B-O-R-E - when you find you've begun to rot.

— Katharine Hepburn

To rule yourself is the ultimate power

— Seneca the Younger

The point we emphasize is strong confidence in our original nature.

— Shunryu Suzuki

America is the country where you can buy a lifetime supply of aspirin For one dollar and use it up in two…

— John Barrymore

Relationships are the core of our existence because they are the core of God's and we are in His image.

— Terryl L. Givens

Those that innovate the future understand history the best.

— Rick Warren

“So...what are you delivering today -- pizza or death?" "Both, actually.  Pepperoni for you now, and a fatal aneurism to the woman…

— Rachel Vincent

The same ones you love will bring you pain.

— J. Cole

You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. You tell me you love me, so now…

— Anonymous

I love inside jokes. I hope to be a part of one some day.

— Michael Scott

In every generation there are a few people who are authentically funny. The cosmetics change. You may not be able to articulate…

— Woody Allen

I'm a person that works off of music. I let the music dictate the direction.

— Jay-Z

It's funny about men and women. Men pay in cash to get them and pay in cash to get rid of them.…

— Hedy Lamarr

“You mean you don't want to come in and hold my hand while I piss?”

— Nenia Campbell

Let's make some funny pictures.

— Tex Avery

How you do anything is how you do everything.

— T. Harv Eker

Don't you hate it when you get on a elevator and someone smells like they took a bath in perfume or cologne.

— JREYES

Wear flats. You're short. It's much cooler not to pretend.

— Alber Elbaz

Pat OBrien knows nothing. Hes on the Hell express.

— Rob Corddry

If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a damn fool about it.

— WCFields

“As your abilities begin to grow, your angelic side will start to manifest itself in more noticeable ways." "My angelic side. Great.…

— Cynthia Hand