Pro-gas-ti-na-tion¦ Waiting to fill up your tank while hoping the gas prices will actually go down. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
This is the curse of our age, that even the strangest aberrations are no cure for boredom. — Stendhal Copy Share Image
Without him here, it is impossible to know how fast he will play it, approximately. — Eugene Ormandy Copy Share Image
I'm a classic example of all humorists - only funny when I'm working. — Peter Sellers Copy Share Image
Etc: The word that makes people think you are smarter than you really are. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Next time you fart, turn to the nearest person and say, Did you hear that asshole talk shit behind my back? — Green Monk Copy Share Image
It was funny to hear that I'd slapped Bieber. I thought it was a joke. Then it blew up. I probably got… — Blake Griffin Copy Share Image
“He’s a pretty serious believer.’ ‘Yeah? Funny how it doesn’t get in the way of his commercial life.’ ‘Yeah, well. Organised religion,… — Richard K. Morgan Copy Share Image
I like it when you reach into a vending machine to grab your candy bar, and that flap goes up to block… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
It is only his wife who stands by her husband like a rock and cheers him up through ups and downs and… — Mak_786 Copy Share Image
“The thing about being an unstoppable force is that you can really only enjoy the experience of being one when you have… — Allie Brosh Copy Share Image
“The amount of educational programming on television today is simply desensitizing. The only reason left to go to school is to see… — Bauvard Copy Share Image
“Rock and roll, big band, the blues. He loved them all. He would close his eyes and with a blissful smile begin… — Mitch Albom Copy Share Image
Justice Scalia and I served together on the D.C. Circuit. So his votes are not surprising to me. What I like about… — Ruth Bader Ginsburg Copy Share Image
