Whereupon a strange euphoria came over me. Not only was I exiled, paralyzed, mute, half deaf, deprived of all pleasures, and reduced… — Jean-Dominique Bauby Copy Share Image
“You have a bunch of cracked-out hoes fighting over Flavor Flav, the king of funk nasty. You have to wonder what in… — Chase Brooks Copy Share Image
Humor of all types is notoriously subjective. That's true not only between different people but even within an individual at different times.… — Robert Mankoff Copy Share Image
“My head is in a world of hurt. My apartment is trashed. At the end of today, I could either be dating… — Pella Grace Copy Share Image
The worst job I ever had was as a forensicologist for the United Nations. One time I thought I'd come across the… — Milton Jones Copy Share Image
“Timothy bit the inside of his lip and pretended to nod sagely. Things were starting to sound a little far-fetched again. "Man,"… — Adrienne Kress Copy Share Image
“When William came to Kyle's aid, he told them that there's nothing wrong with being gay, and that his Uncle Jerry is… — D.W. Marchwell Copy Share Image
I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest:… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
It's so pretentious, but I believe that with comedy, if you have a good story, 90% of it is casting. Once you… — Matt Walsh Copy Share Image
“Um . . . guys? If I, say, noticed a crack in a wall in a tunnel and a cold, creepy draft… — Mark Del Franco Copy Share Image
It was a hard name having growing up as a child. Some kids would call me names like "Birbiglebug" and "Birbibliography" and… — Mike Birbiglia Copy Share Image
“norris didn't cry, but he was apt to puke on them, the way he had puked on homer gamache that time he… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“A friend said to me, “Hey you need to grow a pair. Grow a pair, Bro.” It’s when someone calls you weak,… — Sheng Wang Copy Share Image
“He looked like a sexy ninja. Or a tiger ready to pounce on his prey. She just looked like she was sitting… — Leia Shaw Copy Share Image
“He held out a hand, "I am Lord Bradley, noble nobody if you must know, and greatest source of annoyance to his… — Nicole Sager Copy Share Image
“Aeron’s stone-faced expression cracked, as he turned to give me a dumbfounded look. Meeting his questioning eyes, I let out a little… — M.A. George Copy Share Image
“Yes, I'm sorry you won't be coming with us," Chloe said to Alex. "But please don't worry. I'm certain The Lord has… — Meg Cabot Copy Share Image
A man goes to a fancy dress party dressed only in his Y-fronts. A woman comes up to him and says "What… — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
“A year ago I would’ve been taken in by his chivalry, but now I knew what laid behind the façade: a frog… — Luella Christie Copy Share Image
Life is a campus: in a Greenwich Village bookstore, looking for a New Yorker collection, I asked of an earnest-looking assistant where… — Keith Waterhouse Copy Share Image
I think the best comedy is tragicomic. Yeah, I suppose if you were to look at everything I've done, there is a… — Sharon Horgan Copy Share Image
“It’s complicated,” I said in defense, hands going up to show surrender. “Talk slowly,” Jenna retorted derisively. “Okay, I deserved that,” I… — Laura Kreitzer Copy Share Image
As long as the people who kinda wanna go kill other people are going to go kill other people who kinda wanna… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
The only thing I miss from the sitcom format is that immediate gratification of when you're, if we're talking about comedy, of… — Ray Romano Copy Share Image
“Save your explanations, I got some questions for you first and you'd better answer them!' [slurred Hellian.] 'With what?' [Banaschar] sneered. 'Explanations?'… — Steven Erikson Copy Share Image
I think if I would have started BIG in America, I would probably never have called it BIG. There was nothing but… — Bjarke Ingels Copy Share Image
“ 'A fine story', said Asterinov … 'Six months in prison, that tale,' said Sergei. 'Was it the witch?', I asked 'I… — Adam Roberts Copy Share Image
In England, 'The Muppet Show' is very much seen as an English thing. So for us in the U.K., it is one… — James Bobin Copy Share Image
So if you're black or brown, you can make money in America, you can get rich in America... but whatever you decide… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
“Cal: "I'm really sorry, Professor, but how do you explain these ? Swiss Cake Rolls. That doesn't rhyme; it's not cute; it's… — Brad Barkley Copy Share Image
“Is there any point asking what you're going to make me do on Sunday?' 'Not really.' Okay. 'Is there any point asking… — Michelle Hodkin Copy Share Image
“I'm a writer. I'm a Christian. I like sex. But I haven't had it. I believe in waiting until marriage. But that… — Michelle N. Onuorah Copy Share Image
“Nick jabbed him in the arm with his fork. "What's up with you? Usually you don't shut up about my crap cooking."… — Brigid Kemmerer Copy Share Image
“From steel-town Youngstown to the crumbling marble of Rome — Earl Jenkins ain’t no ordinary knight. He drinks monk-brew, fights Huns, and… — Tapio Tiihonen Copy Share Image
“Nate had been born and raised in British Columbia, and Canadians hate, above all things, to offend. It was part of the… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“This is a lot more satisfying," he said, "when I have intelligent life whom I can render awed, rapt with attention for… — Brandon Sanderson Copy Share Image
The Hawaiian Islands were discovered by hardy Polynesian sailors, who crossed thousands of miles of open ocean in primitive canoes, braving violent… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I think Britain has this tradition which suggests that if you make the readers laugh too much, you can't really be serious.… — Mark Haddon Copy Share Image
“The historian Meike Wöhlert has analyzed and compared the judgments rendered by courts responsible for malicious acts of treason in five cities.… — Rudolph Herzog Copy Share Image
“After playing Halo 2 for 3 hours, I went out and mowed down a Red Cross blood bank, raped anything with a… — Douglas Coupland Copy Share Image
![“Save your explanations, I got some questions for you first and you'd better answer them!' [slurred Hellian.] 'With what?' [Banaschar] sneered. 'Explanations?' 'No. Answers. There's a difference-' 'Really? How? What difference?' 'Explanations are what people use when they need to lie. Y'can always…” quote by Steven Erikson](https://sms4smile.com/q/i/d79/steven-erikson-588_answers_save-your-explanations-i-got-some-questi_1357072.jpg)
