Fast food is hugely important in the life of a comedy writer. All we do is order in, and what we're going… — Mindy Kaling Copy Share Image
For me, a sexy man has three very important qualities: a great sense of humour, intelligence, and loyalty. — Urvashi Rautela Copy Share Image
My wife had her drivers’ test the other day. She got 8 out of 10. The other 2 guys jumped clear. — Rodney Dangerfield Copy Share Image
“Drama is like meat and three veg. Whereas comedy is like the merangue at the end.” — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“Sometimes, things are sad and unfortunate. But finding the funny in a situation can make the sad and unfortunate more bearable.” — Penny Reid Copy Share Image
“One day, we will live in a world without salads. It is a dream I have.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“people don't get me it's more rule than exception God bless exceptions” — Beth Myrle Rice Copy Share Image
While the eyes of the world will be on us let's show everyone that we have a great sense of humour. — Yahoo Serious Copy Share Image
My younger sister's a comedian. She has a sketch comedy group in Chicago called Schadenfreude and I look at her with such… — Brian d'Arcy James Copy Share Image
I feel if I had super powers I will be a Villain. The police would always be looking for me, for some… — Glen Rambharack Copy Share Image
“Even though I can’t tell others whether they should chase their marathon dreams, I highly recommend they do something completely out of… — Dawn Dais Copy Share Image
“You want me to spy on a National Colour operative?' 'Wow,' she said, 'you got it. I thought I was going to… — Jasper Fforde Copy Share Image
“The angel being interrogated paced back and forth, anxiously running his fingers through his hair. Of course, being an angel, he didn't… — Phillip Andrew Bennett Low low Copy Share Image
“Well,” he said with an affected sigh, “you have my approval, at least.” “Why?” Hyacinth asked suspiciously. “It would be an excellent… — Julia Quinn Copy Share Image
I've been to Canada, and they love - oh my God, they love their stand-up comedy in Canada. I've been overseas to… — Brad Williams Copy Share Image
“Not being able to see truth and lies is like being on an empty stage in front of millions of people and… — Garrett Davis Copy Share Image
“She was in no humour for conversation with anyone but himself; and to him she had hardly courage to speak.” — Jane Austen Copy Share Image
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
If Shakespeare were alive today and writing comedy for the movies, he would be the head-liner for the Mack Sennett studios. — Robert Benchley Copy Share Image
I think a lot of ex-addicts. They find a lot of humor in what they did because they lived through it. — Dax Shepard Copy Share Image
“We did something incredibly stupid today." "I know. We should never had had sex without that darn condom." "What?!” — LA Knight Copy Share Image
I like quips. I like whiffs of cynicism and I think they can be witty. But I don't really know where wittiness… — Matthew McConaughey Copy Share Image
If you try to deliver a funny line in a funny way, it comes out as wacky and you ruin the scene. — Bill Burr Copy Share Image
“This is our life now: slaving away in thankless, monotonous jobs and spending half our salaries on fattening food.” — Katrina Ramos Atienza Copy Share Image
“Most of these editors, as they call themselves, couldn't even effectively edit a haiku.” — Frank Black Copy Share Image
Making modern games funny would be easy as pie if it was anybody's goal to actually make a funny game. — Doug TenNapel Copy Share Image
“Only a fool would find happiness from an achievement that is detrimental to those he loves.” — Janvier Chouteu-Chando Copy Share Image
“You’re apologizing? Seriously, what happened to you? Have you been taken over by a pod person?” — Dianne Duvall Copy Share Image
I write funny. If I can make my wife laugh, I know I'm on the right track. — Gene Wilder Copy Share Image
I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
My knee-jerk is that it is comedy and, if you watch them all back-to-back, you will gain something and you will lose… — Mitchell Hurwitz Copy Share Image
Morbid humor is very valid, even healthy, as long as you don't do it gratuitously. — Gary Larson Copy Share Image
“I don't know what a carbuncle is, but it doesn't sound pleasant. I wish one upon Rachel's nose.” — Emily Giffin Copy Share Image
“There’d been some nights when my fat ass had saved my ass (ba-dum-tsh).” — Lish McBride Copy Share Image
“Writing a book is like sliding down a rainbow! Marketing it is like trudging through a field of chewed bubblegum on a… — Betty Dravis Copy Share Image
Sometimes I like to glew my thumbs to my nipples and pretend I'm a T-rex. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I used to do a lot of drugs. I didn't stop because I didn't enjoy them; I stopped because I couldn't handle… — Marc Maron Copy Share Image
“Wait, Richard Cheney, as in Dick Cheney? You're a vampire named Dick Cheney? Somehow, that makes you seem more evil.” — Molly Harper Copy Share Image
My goal is to show people that conservatives are funny. In fact, we're the rebels: we're 'Animal House.' — Gavin McInnes Copy Share Image
“In a case such as this, unless an entire army is available, the safest number of men will be one. We have… — Nicole Sager Copy Share Image
