I grew up in Singapore, and I went to Australia for law school, and after law school, I started doing stand-up comedy. — Ronny Chieng Copy Share Image
Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts. — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
American humor ... is not subtle. It is something that makes you laugh the moment you hear it, you have not to… — Elinor Glyn Copy Share Image
I think 'Country Girl' is one song that can veer into country or hip-hop or rap. You can listen to it and… — Luke Bryan Copy Share Image
I've been lucky enough to play some funny, nasty ladies in my day, and if you can make them foolish, they're even… — Kelly Bishop Copy Share Image
Really I'm a fan of any movie, whether it's suspense, action, or comedy - anything that has a good story. — Scott Eastwood Copy Share Image
“I had a dream that I was in someone else’s shoes for once…they were the wrong size.” — Starley Ard Copy Share Image
In 'Sugar' I'll be singing in every episode and I'll be acting and doing comedy. It's ideal for me if it works. — Barbi Benton Copy Share Image
Catholic schools carry out a great mission, to serve God by building knowledge and character... By teaching the word of God, you… — George W. Bush Copy Share Image
“ "Screw the oath." I lean in until I feel her breath against my face, then I stop. I don't want to… — Shannon Messenger Copy Share Image
“Now, Benny was no eejit. He wasn't expecting the Tunisian nationals to be Irish. What he did expect was darkish people with… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
Thank heaven I don't inherit God from anybody! I am free to make mine up as I wish Him. He's kind and… — Jean Webster Copy Share Image
“It’s good,” Jackson said. “You’re just saying that,” I replied. “No, really, it’s good. A little greasy….” “The grease is part of… — Nick Wilgus Copy Share Image
I'm making fun of myself and I think I'm making fun of all men in our desperate, desperate attempt to understand the… — Robert Mankoff Copy Share Image
Then Saturday Night Live spawns... well, everything right down to American Pie 9, where all humor has to be irrelevant, which can… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Sometimes there's a tackiness about Route 66 that out-tacks any tackiness I've ever seen anywhere else. And the Meramec Caverns are the… — Billy Connolly Copy Share Image
I've done a lot of drama, and comedy was the one genre I was not being offered. So I became obsessive about… — Rachel Weisz Copy Share Image
“Retail therapy—usually one of my first resorts—wasn’t working; I felt like a cat that smelled pit bull.” — M.L.N. Hanover Copy Share Image
You can't deny laughter; when it comes, it plops down in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants. — Stephen King Copy Share Image
A fit of laughter, which has been indulged to excess, almost always produces a violent reaction. — Plato Copy Share Image
A comedian needs more than just a sense of humour. He needs to observe everything around him. — Vivek Copy Share Image
The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Putting any situation through our comedy lens always goes on in our heads. — Sal Vulcano Copy Share Image
“Listen, do yourself a favor. If you ask someone about something such as, “How are the kids,” make sure you really want… — Art Hochberg Copy Share Image
Suffer love! A good ephitet! I do suffer love indeed, for I love thee against my will. — William Shakespeare Copy Share Image
“Keeping that man out of trouble was like trying to return a whore to chastity.” — Lydia Dare Copy Share Image
“If you would not be forgotten As soon as you are dead and rotten, Either write things worth reading, Or do things… — Benjamin Franklin Copy Share Image
The way he's swinging the bat, he won't get a hit until the 20th century. — Jerry Coleman Copy Share Image
“laughter is cathartic and cleansing, that it's good for the body and the soul, and when it's real it's better than sex.” — Patricia Gaffney Copy Share Image
“In fact the bare adjective "bad" hardly scratches the surface of the man's awesome incapacity.” — John Biggins Copy Share Image
A comedian is not a person who opens a funny door - he's the person who opens a door funny. — Chuck Jones Copy Share Image
A beautiful woman moved in next door. So I went over and returned a cup of sugar. She said, "You didn't borrow… — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
Whatever I do, when I'm working, I'm very serious. But after, I will play, I am funny. — Sammo Hung Copy Share Image
“Listen, you’re not doing God any favors by praying. You’re doing yourself a favor.” — Art Hochberg Copy Share Image
I was one of the people that always got chosen last, and I think I bulked up my comedy bone to make… — Michelle Visage Copy Share Image
“I believe I'm done for," said Tom. "The cussed sneaking dog, to leave me to die alone! My poor old mother always… — Harriet Beecher Stowe Copy Share Image
I try and make myself or consenting people I am very close to the victims of my comedy. I don't enjoy bullying… — Greg Davies Copy Share Image
“Revenge is a dish best served cold but Mama prefers to serve it with hot gravy, potatoes, and roast turkey.” — Jonathan Dunne Copy Share Image
“My elderly mother's favorite drink is "Johnnie." She's already got a walker.” — Dan Adams Copy Share Image
“In the legal respect, after the execution of the supposed incendiaries, the other half of Moscow burned down.” — Leo Tolstoy Copy Share Image
