Humor Quotes · Page 240

“Life is both too short, and too long, to be without a sense of humor.”

— Charline Ratcliff

We sit in a room for months trying to think of funny things.

— David Walliams

When someone say some thing really funny and u can't stop laughing

— Gummy_bears

“Does it not occur to people that I might be artificial by nature?”

— Maurice Ravel

“A muffin what? Are you asking me to eat you or something?”

— Anonymous

“I wanted a Blaine but ended up with a Duckie.”

— Ashley Edward Miller

“No, dude. I told you, we're not crazy.”

— Natasha Larry

“Just because you act a little guilty doesn't mean you're innocent.”

— Charlie Chan

Pain makes you stronger. Tears make you braver. Heartbreak makes you wiser. And vodka makes you not remember any of that crap.

— Anonymous

If I can combine all your facebook status, I can have a nice Horror, comedy, drama sci-fi movie in one day..

— Simphiwe Scientist

“The way I see it: Why get out of bed when you can read about people who got out of bed?”

— Eric Foreman That 70's Show

There's so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets?

— Dick Cavett

“I have met countless people who do not have a single droplet of common sense”

— Kelly Skeete

Comedy always benefits from different points of view and even tension. It can never be satisfied.

— Nahnatchka Khan

There is nothing like a gleam of humor to reassure you that a fellow human being is ticking inside a strange face.

— Eva Hoffman

His motto is "Love Thy Neighbor". His neighbor is an 18 year old hooker.

— Henny Youngman

If a dog doesn't put you first where are you both? In what relation? A dog needs God. It lives by your…

— Enid Bagnold

Girls are supposed to be feminine and demure. Comedy isn't about that, so you just have to unlearn it. Certain women are…

— Jennifer Coolidge

“Gemma talking to Charley... "Got it. Have you seen my pants?" "Speaking of which, how did you get home without them?" "I…

— Darynda Jones

A person who is a comedian does comedy in real life, too. But then there are others, too, who are very good…

— Johnny Lever

I was out walking the other evening. This fellow accosted me, and asked if that was the moon up there in the…

— Chic Murray

“Bob,” I said, louder. “Are you saying it… it ate my magic?” Bob got a defensive look on his face. “Not all…

— Jim Butcher

“You two sure are sleeping late for grown-ups. Did you stay up praying again last night?" "Praying?" Jamie asked with a frown.…

— Lisa Worrall

I think I have a good sense of humor, but I'm not, like, a joke-teller. I get the jokes, which is sometimes…

— Mila Kunis

It's awfully funny how the ones with the most to say know the least.

— Anonymous

Can you restrain your laughter, my friends?

— Horace

“Life with the Guru - there is no manual.”

— Art Hochberg

People with no sense of humor, I feel so bad for them.

— Janelle James

“I was about to run, possibly fight, definitely scream...”

— Jessica Fortunato

One never needs their humor as much a when they argue with a fool.

— Chinese Proverbs

I've got a sense of humor. I'm a funny guy.

— Daryl Hall

The blind see what they want to see.

— Dan Brown

“In the State of Denmark there was the odor of decay...”

— Roger Zelazny

“Keep treating me like a damn dog, Cush, and I'll bite you.”

— Quinn Loftis

“Sometimes being a contrary bastard was a real pain.”

— Lori Foster

If you tell the truth about how youre feeling, it becomes funny.

— Larry David

That place is so behind the times, you can't even get AIDS there yet.

— Doug Stanhope

Comedy is a group activity, a verbal orgy.

— Chris Rock

“hey there, demons. it's me, ya boy”

— Shane from Buzzfeed

Humor comes from the surprise release of some buried tension.

— Lorrie Moore