Funny Quotes · Page 111

To build up a future, you have to know the past.

— Otto Frank

I was unfashionable before anyone knew who I was.

— Paul Desmond

I am not ladies man.. Lol :D

— Vishak

Adulterate: Full price at the movies

— Nikhil Saluja

Throw dirt on me, and grow a wildflower…

— Live_Skate_Smoke

Move too quickly and time will pass you by.

— Al Barry

Do yourself what you wish others to do.

— Ramakrishna

Doctors didn't know what to do with me.

— Darrell Hammond

I don't need your attitude, I have one of my own , Bitch .

— Green Monk

I had a dream about you.. Awww ! really?.. Yes. you died..

— Carissa Aydaa

But our country's equivalent of gritty reality is more like "Look out Sarge, he's got a shooter!"

— Bill Bailey

If you create Youtility, your customers will keep you close.

— Jay Baer

It is better not to proceed at all than to proceed without purpose.

— Confucius

MARRIAGE, SUCCESSFUL, is not so much finding the right person -- but being the right person;

— Nikhil Saluja

Cocaine is Gods way of saying you're making to much money.

— Anonymous

I dont know my friends address but I know EXACTLY WHERE THEIR HOUSE IS.

— Ronde Dawson

Deaar boysss : your dicck is not likeee pinocchio's noseee. It wont qet lonqer every timee youuu liee bout its sizeee. Sincerelyy , Reality'.

— REaliTy

“So did you murder Balekin?' Nihuar asks me, clearly able to put off her curiosity no longer. 'Yes,' I say. 'After he…

— Holly Black

“I do not go to church. I don’t go to Christian church or Jew church or any other church. I don’t go…

— Michael Ian Black

“I can't go into a long explanation before company; but I couldn't help it, upon my honour." Upon your what?" growled Sikes,…

— Charles Dickens

I did everything I could do and tried as hard as I could. In light of how I putted, I guess second…

— Cristie Kerr

Every man has a definite style to attract woman. But the golden rule says: No one is tempted, if she is not…

— Laine

The only thing that matters to me about my stories is that they're entertaining and they're funny. And I tend to get…

— Christopher Moore

THE T.V SAID'''Lets make love on back of a whale at sea world, Or chocolate factory, or in a hot air balloon,…

— Jazzy

People are as happy as they choose to be.

— Henry Ford

When I'm singing the blues, I'm singing life.

— Etta James

There is no best anything in art.

— Jeff Daniels

Make others happy, and you will be happy yourself.

— Lorenzo Snow

Dream, dream, for this is also sooth.

— William Butler Yeats

And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate

— Taylor Swift

I retired from everything except work.

— Lee Friedlander

Bitterness is a greater failure than failure.

— James Richardson

If I didn't exist, I would have invented myself.

— Arthur C. Clarke

I can speak Esperanto like a native.

— Spike Milligan

I'm not hard to please, I'm content with the very best.

— Fernand Point

Leh we do like toiletpaper and roll!!!!

— Trini Gurl

Yes, but that's our strongest weak point.

— Samuel Goldwyn

DROOLING: How teething babies wash their chins.

— Nikhil Saluja

That's okay, honey. I used to believe in things too.

— Homer Simpson

I used to do drugs, but that was way back there.

— Dave Attell