My dad is the boss. . .until Grandma comes over. Then hes just one of us — Green Monk Copy Share Image
No babies on this plane. I don't want to be the one crying & puking for the entire duration of the flight… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
My girlfriends are my most valuable possessions, thats why I keep them locked up in closet. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Wish there was a pill I could put in a girl's drink, that would make her do my taxes. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
In case of emergency exits can be located at the sign out, delete, deactivate, mute & block features Thank you for flying… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
What is the fastest thing in the world? Milk, because it's pasteurized before you see it! — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Research has revealed that you can actually fall in love with your own wife if some other man describes her to you... — Green Monk Copy Share Image
If it wasn't for my excitement to hate someone new I wouldn't leave my bed in the morning. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Ever wonder about the true purpose of mosquitoes? I'm thinking it must be God's source of amusement... watching us slap ourselves! — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Two women were talking. When I was young, I used to laugh when my mother crossed her legs when she had to… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Love is a feeling that is really hard to explain, but its the greatest feeling you could ever have. But love could… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
A couple had twins - a boy & a girl. In their family, it was the tradition of the father's brother to… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Women fake headaches to get out of having sex with their man, and men fake not being married to have sex with a woman. — Green Monk Copy Share
I've been told by so many women that I'm a great listener. A majority of them, have big boobs. — Green Monk Copy Share
Scientists have found that women share the same dna as prawns.. Their heads are full of shit but their pink bits taste amazing! — Green Monk Copy Share
When someone is mad and asks you Do I look stupid? Don't answer them just stare curiously at them — Green Monk Copy Share
You may love a girl very deeply... But u CANNOT express it more deeper than... 5, 6 or 7 inches... — Green Monk Copy Share
Note To Females: You cant blame the entire male genre just because you were attracted to some assholes. — Green Monk Copy Share
That awkward moment when you can't understand what someone has said even though they have repeated it four times — Green Monk Copy Share
Life should come with a remote. There are so many moments I'd give up my life for to pause, fast-forward, and rewind. — Green Monk Copy Share
I wish Twitter would notify me when someone UN-followed me, that way I could go star it. — Green Monk Copy Share
I like those Birthday reminders on Facebook because occasionally they remind me of the friends I need to Delete. — Green Monk Copy Share
