Funny Quote by Tommy Cooper Download Open image “I bought some HP sauce the other day. It's costing me 6p a month for the next 2 years.” — Tommy Cooper ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 3.0 out of 5 (3 ratings) Copy quoteShare Funny Humor Months Next Sauce Years
I Seriously Have To Stop Spending All This Money On Fast Food.. Buy It So Often, It's All Starting To Taste The Same. — Jermaine McIver Copy Share Image
I was upset about getting $40 haircuts, like, every month. That's a lot of money, and so, man, that's a lot of food. That's… — Steven Adams Copy Share Image
Anybody gone into Whole Foods lately and see what they charge for arugula? I mean, they're charging a lot of money for this stuff. — Barack Obama Copy Share Image
I tend to 'splurge' for convenience. I'll pay a lot to not waste time. — Tom Anderson Copy Share Image
I tend to tell my readers to go for the cheapest ingredients every time, unless they're unbearable. If so, you only need to have… — Jack Monroe Copy Share Image
Frugality, I've learned, has its own cost, one that sometimes lasts forever. — Nicholas Sparks Copy Share Image
I saw soda pop for $1.20 a six pack. That price messes with your head. You start thinking you're gonna sell soda pop. Suddenly… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
It doesn't matter how many times the audience has heard it before. If it's funny, it's funny. — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
“Two blondes walk into a building. You'd think at least one of them would have seen it.” — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed,… — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
I inherited a painting and a violin which turned out to be a Rembrandt and a Stradivarius. Unfortunately, Rembrandt made lousy violins and Stradivarius… — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
Last night I dreamed I ate a ten-pound marshmallow, and when I woke up the pillow was gone. — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself. — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
Gambling has brought our family together. We had to move to a smaller house. — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
And an airplane of spittle dived into the sea, there were no salivas. — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
He said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library. I thought, "That's… — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
My wife said, 'Take me in your arms and whisper something soft and sweet.' I said, 'chocolate fudge.' — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
Electricity is a wonderful thing. Do you realise that if we didn't have electricity, we'd be watching television by candle light? — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
When you step out and do a song in a musical, the easier thing to do is make it funny. But when those transitions… — Kelli O'Hara Copy Share Image
It's a hard thing to describe. It's just this sense that you got something to say. — Jonah Lehrer Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Congratulations to Facebook on going public with all my private information... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you were to send a werewolf to the moon, would he be a werewolf permanently? — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
