Comedy Quote by Jack Handey Download Open image “I want to recriminalise homosexuality, so i can feel dirty when i do it.” — Jack Handey ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 3.4 out of 5 (5 ratings) Copy quoteShare Comedy Dirty Feels Funny Homosexuality Want
I have no problem with homosexuality. I have a problem with homosexual acts. — Rick Santorum Copy Share Image
If you're gay, that doesn't mean I want to discriminate against you, belittle or bully you, abuse or offend you. Not at all. I… — Mehdi Hasan Copy Share Image
I've decided to become gay, not in a sexual way, but I am going to start picking up around the house. — Dov Davidoff Copy Share Image
I've become really comfortable with my sexuality and making no excuses for it anymore. — Halle Berry Copy Share Image
I very much want to inject gay culture into the mainstream. It's not an underground tool for me. It's my whole life. — Lady Gaga Copy Share Image
One thing is to have the protection of human rights for homosexuals and quite something else is this promotion of indecency. It would be… — Ali Sina Copy Share Image
Gender, race, ethnicity – these are all morally neutral. But homosexuality is – involves voluntary sexual conduct with serious public health, social, sociological implications.… — Scott Lively Copy Share Image
If ever we needed in this country to adopt a new attitude towards homosexuality, this is the time. Instead of treating it as a… — Tommy Douglas Copy Share Image
Sometimes life seems like a dream, especially when I look down and see that I forgot to put on my pants. — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I think the best Thanksgiving we ever had was one where we didn't even have a turkey. Mom and Dad sat us kids down… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
At first I thought, if I were Superman, a perfect secret identity would be "Clark Kent, Dentist," because you could save money on tooth… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Sometimes I wonder if I'm patriotic enough. Yes, I want to kill people, but on both sides. — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I don't understand people who say life is a mystery, because what is it they want to know? — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
It's probably not a good idea to be chewing on a toothpick if you're talking to the president, because what if he tells a… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Probably to a shark, about the funniest thing there is is a wounded seal, trying to swim to shore, because WHERE DOES HE THINK… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I wish I lived back in the Old West days, because I'd save up my money for about twenty years so I could buy… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Why do there have to be rules for everything? It's gotten to the point that rules dominate just about every aspect of our lives.… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Here's a suggestion for a new animal, if some new ones get created or evolve: something that stings you, then laughs at you. — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
When you go ice-skating, try not to swing your arms too much, because that really annoys me. — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
'Mad TV' is one of my most favorite shows of all time and is a huge part of my obsession with sketch comedy. — Shane Dawson Copy Share Image
I wouldn't want people to laugh at me. That's why I have to give all that I can, and at least produce something that… — Zhao Wei Copy Share Image
“Our world will not die as a result of the bomb, as the papers say, it will die of laughter, of banality, of making a joke… — Carlos Ruiz Zafon Copy Share Image
In the future, I would like to do more films with contemporary themes. Perhaps comedy, which is something I have done in theater but… — Luke Evans Copy Share Image
That's something a lot of folks don't know about me - I'm pretty darn funny. — Michael Jai White Copy Share Image
I have that need in me, I want everyone to love me, but I'm embarrassed by that need, so I wanted to cover it… — Anthony Jeselnik Copy Share Image
There's a difference between delivering real funny and just silly funny. — Lil Rel Howery Copy Share Image
Oh to that corkscrew, the useful tool to unlock the treasure of wit, the treasury of laughter, the front door of fellowship, and the… — Andrew Guzaldo Copy Share Image
