Quote by David Sedaris

“Leeches are singing in my asshole.”

— David Sedaris

“We walked up the steps of a quaint stone church. "Get those friggin' leeches away from me!" a familiar voice yelled from a second…

— Suzanne Selfors

“The only sound was Alvin’s snorts of laughter. “Dude, you’re the only one standing there! Who are you talking to, the vegetable dip?” he…

— Elizabeth Cody Kimmel

“He pulled the tiller and shouted the words, "Ready about ... LEE HO!" I stared at him incredulously. What sort of things was that…

— Chris Stewart

“And then, abruptly, the voice turned to a different tone—sharper, harsher, more desperate. Then it hushed altogether. The sensation was like sitting by a…

— Bella Forrest

“Did you hear about the blonde coyote? A: Got stuck in a trap, chewed off three legs, and was still stuck.”

— Johnny B. Laughing

Hip," I murmur, remembering last night, how I lost it completely in a stall at Nell's---my mouth foaming, all I could think about were…

— Bret Easton Ellis

“She had turned away and was watching a duck out on the lake. It was tucking into weeds, a thing I've never been able…

— P.G. Wodehouse

“I tried to be as inconspicuous as possible as I lay the sausage against my ear. Abruptly, my cell phone went dead. A drop…

— David Wong

“Rook gave Heat and Ochoa each a bottle of water, and both chugged. 'While you were in there, I went in the pet shop…

— Richard Castle

“And soon we were just rolling around on the ground, cursing and screeching and ripping out handfuls of hair. Without super hearing, I wouldn't…

— Molly Harper

“There was a merciless gnawing in my chest, a queer silent labor was going on in there. I pictured a score of nice teeny-weeny…

— Knut Hamsun