America Quote by Conan O'Brien

Rick Perry said Donald Trump is unfit to be president and called for him to immediately withdraw from the race. Then he said, 'And…

— Jimmy Fallon

Down in Texas, Rick Perry announced he will not run for reelection. He said 'I executed one last woman, that fertilizer plant exploded, I…

— Bill Maher

I salute Rick Perry for the way he's trying to overcome this. Today he came out and said he's not one of those slick…

— Craig Ferguson

Personally, I hope he doesn't get out of the campaign. I need Rick Perry. I don't want to spend the next year trying to…

— Craig Ferguson

Big news from last night's Republican debate, you guys. It turns out George Bush was actually the smart Texas governor.

— Jimmy Fallon

Rick Perry's an idiot, and I don't think anyone would disagree with that,

— Bruce Bartlett

Natural Texas politicians make terrible, terrible presidential candidates. Phil Gramm, I remember the 'Phil Gramm for President' campaign. I thought that was the worst…

— Gail Collins

Texas governor Rick Perry has been in the race only three days, and he's already blowing away the competition like it is a trespassing…

— Stephen Colbert

Remember, I'm not running against Rick Perry; I'm running against apathy.

— Kinky Friedman

Rick Perry was philosophical about (his election losses). He said, 'Last week was Iowa. Yesterday was New Hampshire. ' He said at least it's…

— Jay Leno

You know, there are a lot of would-be governors of Texas sitting around today who never took the opportunity to get into a race…

— Laura Bush

I think there's one more thing Perry can forget, too: Being president.

— Jay Leno